Change Is Overrated

iv

: : CHAPTER FOUR : :

"Things are never as they seem."

"You don't know a thing about me." He says quietly, but firmly, while his eyes bore holes into my head.

"I know enough." I whisper back, looking everywhere but at him.

"What you know," he pauses, waiting for me to meet his eyes once again. As I do, he continues, "is only what I let people see. You know absolutely nothing." I try my best to suppress the shiver that runs down my spine at his words.

I have never heard someone talk like this. So, cold, yet inviting. Almost as if he's asking me to ask him questions, wanting me to beg to know more. I think he's just a boy who wants to feel accepted, not just by those sluts who only want in his pants, but for who he really is. There's a person hiding behind this mask, and I believe that person is not at all who he's pretending to be.

"Then. . .Then tell me something. Let me know who you really are, if you're that sure that I know nothing at all. Tell me." I whisper. His eyes are scrutinizing me, as if he's judging with his eyes, if he can trust me or not; which prompts me to add on, "...You can t-trust me, you know?"

My attempt to soothe only makes his eyes become suddenly cold and hard, not the open and willing emotion that they previously portrayed. "I don't trust anyone." He stated.

"I've noticed." I mumble under my breath, looking down at my hands and fiddling with my fingers. He sighed and stepped back, finally allowing me room to breathe. I let go of a huge breath I didn't even know I had been holding.

I so desperately wanted to get out of the room, being in here with him was only causing me to stress and stress is never good. But on the other hand, I want to stay in here as long as it takes to get to know Harrison; he has a lot to share, I just wish he was willing to. I must admit, it hurt a lot when he said he couldn't trust me. People tell me all the time that they feel like they can share their deepest secrets immediately after meeting me, I'm not used to this.

"I-I can tell you s-something about me first? If it'll help?" He turns around from where he was facing the wall opposite me and scrutinizes my face. With him staring at me like this I feel that I shouldn't have said anything in the first place, but after a long pause, he replies.

"Like what?" It really was a simple question, but it has me baffled. I didn't think that far ahead, I just asked him on impulse. I didn't have any secretive stuff on hold, ready for when he asked a question like this.

"Well," Come on Aubrey, think of something quick. The first thing that comes to my mind is my sister, but I can't go there. It's too soon, and it's Harrison we're talking about here. Before I could really think about what I was going to say, I was already talking. "I think my dad is cheating on my mom."

After I say it, I gasp at myself. I can't believe I just said that. That was a private theory that I had since my dad started having all of these "business trips", but I had never said that out loud before, or to anyone. Harrison seems just as shocked as I am at my words. "Really?" He asks. Well, it's talk now, or deny it and chance him bugging me for more information.

"Yeah, I mean, my dad hasn't been around for a couple years now. He'll disappear for months at a time for "business" and when he does come home, he doesn't really interact with us, my mom and I."

"Oh." He simply says. I don't think he really knew how to respond to that. Then again, neither would I, if I were him.

We fall into an awkward silence after that, neither of us sure how to continue, which is odd, especially for Harrison. I want to ask him to share now, since I just did, but I'm a wimp, and I don't really want him to completely close himself off again.

"Um..." I quietly say. "Your turn?" I ask hesitantly. As soon as the words leave my mouth I cringe immediately expecting an outburst, instead I hear him slide down the wall into a sitting position.

"I guess I do owe you something." He sighs while I stand the wall opposite him, gaping openly. Not in a million years did I think he'd actually take me up on my offer.

Wait—WAIT. Why am I even prying this much? I don't like Harrison. He's annoying and rude. It doesn't help that even Lola told me to stay away from him. All the signs are pointing away from him and here I am basically begging him to spill some secrets that I shouldn't even want to know about him.

My thoughts are cut off when I realize he's talking again, and as much as I hate to admit, I immediately stop all thought processes to listen to what he has to say.I slide down the wall to match his position.

"—Started when I was about 4. . .My dad just got up and left one day. He never came back, never contacted me. Nothing." What do I possibly respond with? I can't just be like, 'Sucks to suck'. I've never had to walk on eggshells with anyone before. This is new territory for me.

". . .I'm sorry he just up and left like that." I decided on saying. It sounds like I care, but not begging for him to explain further.

"Yeah well life sucks." He replied.

"You can say that again."

---

I'm running down a long, abandoned street. I feel like my body weighs a ton, a struggle just to lift one leg after the other in order to continue running. From what, I don't know. All I know is I keep checking behind me, so far, nothing to indicate anything. Mindlessly running to an unknown destination that my mind is conjuring up.

Out of nowhere I am slamming into something. No, someone. Of course, I scream, but before a real sound could come out, there's a hand over my mouth. I start squirming and get a glimpse of my attacker.

As soon as he sees I recognize him, he smirks very creepily and removes his hand.

"Hey Sunshine, miss me?" He asks, all too sweetly.

"ROSEY!"

I snap upright and the first thing I notice is Harrison's face 3 inches from my own.

"Holy shit!" I squeal and move a safe distance away.

"It's alright, you're okay..." He pauses, assessing my physical appearance, I'm sure I look a mess. "What was your dream about? You were screaming pretty loud."

"N-nothing. Nothing to worry about here, everything's fine and dandy..." Oh god I'm a horrible liar, what happened to the confident girl who stood her ground earlier today? 

I guess she comes and goes as she pleases.

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