CHAPTER TWO
MELA'S LIFE HADN'T ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THIS.
if that wasn't the most obvious statement ever. she'd grown up in Port Macquarie, east coast city where the beaches were dotted with surfers and the sidewalks were dotted with skaters. normal schooling all the way up until her gap year, where she'd travelled and met a guy and fallen in love. love that was stupid. love that was crumbly.
Mela didn't like embellishing things but she so wanted to be able to embellish her and Michaels relationship. they had so many good times. so many good, good, great times. his band played in theatres and pubs and she'd been there for every show. everything. she'd been there for everything. the first contract. the last homemade youtube video. everything, all put down in her memory, all covered in dust. Mela didn't touch those memories now. thinking about how it was was too hard.
she'd wished things had turned out differently. wished so violently and with so much hope it was excruciating when the wishes nose dived. but then, if things had turned out differently she would not have Alice. she wouldn't have the most important thing in her universe.
the job interview went well. it was her second for this company and she thought she might be getting it- thought she was in with a chance. the woman interviewing her seemed lovely. it all seemed lovely. but she said she needed more time to consider and Mela was sent away again, a ball on the paddles you get at the arcade, flung away and then drawn back in only to be flung away again.
by the time she was all done it was lunch and she was grumbly, mimicking the pout Ali had been doing earlier. she stopped by a cafe on the way home and grabbed a sandwich and water but didn't stop to eat. she'd been like that since Michael left, always hurrying back to her home, scared Ali was going to go get a record deal and a plane ticket and be off just like her daddy. Mela couldn't deal with Ali leaving her, probably ever.
she checked her phone while stuck in traffic to see a message from Michael. immediately she ignored it. she ignored most of them, truthfully. about every three days she'd open his messages up and binge on them, replying with bland messages that didn't reveal the fact she'd been analysing his a few seconds ago. this behaviour was probably more obsessive then just replying as soon as she got them- scratch that, it was definitely more obsessive.
Mela was kind of lucky, in the sense that while she was only 17 when she fell pregnant she had a partner with a level of financial security and almost good morals. Michael made sure she had a nice apartment and all the essential baby needs and everything to keep her content while he dashed off to travel the globe, singing and partying and probably enjoying every plastic second of it. he'd flown back for the birth, arrived about an hour before the big finale. he'd held Ali and agreed on the name and kissed Mela on the mouth when she was all sweaty and swearing at him and covered in guck. he'd spent four days. magazines had gone crazy. and then he left and Mela and Alice were on their own. the way they'd been practically ever since then, except for Mela's birthday where Michael had flown in for the day and then disappeared with the sunset.
she was also lucky in the sense that, because of her vaguely rich ex-boyfriend, she had been able to take ages and ages away from the world after Ali's birth. just her and the baby. weeks getting to know the child and Mela wouldn't have traded those for anything. she'd started a fashion blog in her spare time- something to keep her entertained- and after a few weeks was receiving thousands of hits. people asked her all the time to do job interviews like the one at Lula. but even though she seemed to be overly capable of handling the web page, no one wanted her in their office.
Mela didn't realise she was pulling into her apartment until she stopped the car and got out. thoughts had a way of pulling her in and holding her hostage. the apartment building Michael had helped her pick out (picked out for her, really) was lovely. the apartments were big and spacious and it was in a very good neighbourhood. the lovely girl down the hall, Tinker, would babysit Ali for just a couple dollars an hour. she was lucky. she was lucky.