Starting Over

Sophomore Year in High School

It's the beginning of my sophomore year and I was so nervious. In the beginning I though school would be harder this year turns out it was pretty good cause I had some one I could turn to for help. I hang out with my best friend Sabrina everyday. She always knew how to make me laugh, she always put a smile on my face no matter how mad or upset I was. I actually felt like someone cared about me. When I started talking to her I didn't want to self harm anymore because I could always talk to her. She may not have understood what I was going through but she knew it wasn't good to hurt my self over it. I told her about how in fourth grade everyone, except two people bullied me. I wish it was as easy as it was then when I didn't think about cutting, but life went on and I became more and more depressed from the kids bullying me that I started to cut my wrist and and my thighs. I've showed her the scars she told me it wasn't worth it. She said it's not worth ruining ur beautiful body just cause someone hurts you. So since then I didn't cut.

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As the days went by, its now the end of first quarter and I've started to feel depressed again. I tried hiding it, I tried keeping it all bundled up inside, but it got to me and I started cutting again. The pain I was going through was too much. I got yelled at everyday by my dad I ended up crying my self to sleep most nights. I felt alone like I was in a dark place and couldn't get out.I was so lost and didn't know what to do. I began listing to suicide prevention songs which helped but it just wasn't enough. I was at lunch one day and I started talking to this girl and we became best friends almost like sisters. Her name is Destiny. We hung out all the time we talked on a daily basis. We didn't go a day with out talking. Soon I opened up to her and told her everything that's been going on. Little did I know she was having similar problems a little worse than mine tho. We helped each other through so much.