Sterek ~ One Shots

Happy For Him

Derek's POV

Being in love with someone who's already in love with someone else is probably the worst feeling in the world. But knowing that they're happy kind of makes it up for it. The feeling doesn't go away but it makes it a tad bit less painful. It gives you that feeling that even though you aren't able to make them happy, someone else is and that's all you want. For them to be happy. And it might sound cliché but there's really nothing you can do about that. You can only just stand by and watch the person you love be in love with someone else. The fact that the best friend of that person know makes it kind of worse. Especially when they sometimes look at you with that apologetic look in their eyes. It all just brings up the feelings of being alone again. Knowing that even though you might find someone else, they'll never be enough to make you forget about that person. They'll probably won't even be enough to really be in love with. Not when the person you really love happens to be one of your close friends and you see them every day.

It sucks but I guess I wasn't born to be lucky. At least not lucky enough to be happy with someone else. It's not like I'm depressed or anything. It's just quite sad. Sometimes it makes me cry. Most of the time, to be honest. Other times I'm like an emotionless freak who just stares out in space with nothing but a blank look on his face. It kind of depends on how happy they looked or how much affection they showed.

When they kiss, that is for me the worst thing in the whole world. I always get that same dreadful feeling in my chest when I see them kiss. It's like someone is stabbing me in the hart with a knife over and over again. It's then that I have to try and stop the tears. I know for a fact that if I didn't try that they would come rolling down my cheeks in only a matter of seconds. So the only thing I know is either look away from it and bite my lip, hoping that no one saw or just watch and pray to god that it won't last long.

There's always a huge part of me that wishes that it was me that made him so happy. That it was me instead of her. That I was the one putting that smile on his face. But it wasn't me. It was her. And that hurt. It hurt a lot. But there was nothing that I could do about it but watch. And that hurt even more.

I still remember the day when Lydia and Scott confronted me about it. They stayed after a pack meeting was over. At first I had thought that it had something to do with what was going on. But I soon realized that it wasn't about that. Not when they both sat down on the couch in front of me with a somewhat determined look on their faces.

When Lydia asked me that dreaded question, I was both shocked and bit scared, to be honest. Not because I was scared of them. No. Because I had thought that I was doing an okay job with hiding it. Clearly I wasn't. Otherwise they wouldn't have noticed. And they did.

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"You love him, don't you?"

My eyes widened as soon as Lydia asked me that question. I looked at her and there must have been a quite vulnerable look on my face because when she saw me look at her, her somewhat harsh stare changed in to a soft questioning one.

"Derek?" She tried again.

I shrugged.

We just had a pack meeting and everyone had left. Except for Scott and Lydia. They claimed that they needed to talk to me about something. If I had known that it was going to be about this... I probably would've said that I was busy.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I said. They needed to stop this. They really needed to stop talking about this. But the strength that I used to have to tell them off, to tell anyone off, is gone. I wasn't capable to use only my voice. It didn't sound as strong anymore. It made me wonder if it really was that bad.

Lydia's soft look changed again. She was clearly not in the mood to talk crap. "Cut the crap, Derek." Lydia shot me a challenging look, letting me know that she was being quite serious. "You're in love with him and that's that."

I shrugged. Again. Not really knowing what to say to that very true statement.

A sigh was heard and soon Scott was sat down next to me on the couch. "Why haven't you told any of us?" He questioned.

I scoffed. "'Cause it's not something that I'm willing to talk about, okay."

"Why not?" Lydia asked.

I shook my head, frowning as I look down at my hands.

"Derek... Why not?" She tried again.

My frown deepened. "It just hurts, okay?" I was slightly hoping that they would take that as a hint and leave it alone but that didn't happen.

"What hurts?" Scott questioned.

"What do you think?" I looked at him with wide eyes. "I finally am in love with someone who won't ever try to destroy me and everyone I love but there's nothing that I can do about it because he already has someone to make him happy. That's what hurts." I shook my head. "Please don't?" I pleaded.

With a confused look on his face, Scott tilted his head to the side. "Don't what?" He questioned.

"Don't give me that look." I told him. "If there is one thing that I really don't need, it's you guys giving me those pitiful looks. You'll only make it worse."

Nodding their heads, they both kept quiet. They probably didn't know what else to say.

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Ever since that day, Scott has been hanging out with me. At least if you call, trying to make useless conversations with me as hanging out. He would stay a little longer after a pack meeting or he would sometimes show up at the loft with a pack of beers and a collection of movies.

It was nice. Yet it was also something that sort of made it just a tad worse.

It was nice because knowing that he was trying to get my mind of off him was something that I needed in my life. Someone who was there for me.

Though seeing Scott more than usual made it that little bit more worse because he reminded me of him. Every time Scott stayed at the loft longer than usual I was reminded of the fact that he would normally be hanging out with him. He would normally be at his house. And the thought of that made frown.

The thing that bothered me the most was 'what if he knows?' or 'what if he finds out?'. Every time I see him I ask myself those same damn questions. Every damn time. And it's slowly driving me insane.

But, then again,... There's nothing I can do about it.

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Hey lovelies

I'm really sorry about this one. The idea just popped in to my head and wanted to make a one shot about it.

If you guys want another part for this one, just let me know.

Anyways,

Vote, comment...

Love ya guys:)