Adventures in the White Van

Chapter 3: The Rosen Dragon

Psyko's P.O.V.

Well. That's not good. Zachary's not good. That means everything's not good.

"Yeah... Zoey we should probably leave now. And by now I mean NOW." I said. In honesty, I didn't care much for the girl, but I didn't exactly want to watch her be consumed by Zachary - which yes, would most definitely happen.

"But we didn't even get to have any awesome adventures!" She complained.

"This is not the time for adventures, human creature!" I shouted. "Do you WANT to be eaten by a Zachary?!"

"No, but I wanna have an awesome adventure!" She whined.

"Well if you stay here, you'll have plenty of adventures... inside of a hydra's stomach!"

"That sounds... kinda disgusting. Also, a what?"

"A hydra is what Zachary is. Three heads? Duh. And oh it really is, believe me. I spent three years in a dragon's stomach once. Not Zachary though, another one, because he's a hydra, which are like way cooler... there's actually quite a few around here. Which, now that I think about it, is not good for the people around us, since Zachary may or may not have been the heir to an Alpha Male War Leader to his people and lead them to a large scale battle, which I was warned about last visit here... but I kinda thought he was still a baby."

"Oh. That sounds like it would suck."

"Yes, it would. Like, it would suck like those miniature plunger things on Dave's tentacles or whatever they're called, I dunno what they are."

Suddenly, Dave made a bubbling noise that caught my attention. I looked over and saw him jump off of Zoey's head, running over to somewhere.

"FOLLOW THE DAVE!" I shouted, and floated over to Dave. Of course the stupid little mortal decided to use her legs. Doesn't she know that floating is much more efficient? Like, seriously? Legs are for the weak. Only a weakling would use those flesh tendrils when you can just move around through the air. Mortals confuse me so much.

After a few minutes, Dave had lead us from the cave and into a valley. He suddenly turned to me and glubbed.

"Wait... wait, what?! No! No, Dave! We cannot use her!" I said. "For one, Zoey here would probably go blind. For two, she's extremely unstable, kinda like Zoey. And for three, she's freakin' creepy!" I answered him.

Dave shook his head, and waved his arms around.

"No, Dave! You don't get it! She will probably eat my face off!"

"What are you two talking about?" Zoey asked, curiously.

"An old friend." I simply said. I turned back to Dave. "Let us just see if we can solve this ourselves first and leave, and we'll use her only if we need to."

Dave made another blubby noise, like an unamused "fine..."

"Alright, human thing, we gotta go. We can take refuge in one of the villages for now, then find our way back to the Van."

Zoey looked confused. "Can't you just use one of your weird powers to just bring us back to the Van?"

Zoey's P.O.V.

Psyko slowly brought his face down to mine, and through the eyeholes in his mask I could see only the darkest of expressions. Though the darkness within the mask covered his eyes and their color, I could still feel the harshness of his eyeballs piercing through my very soul. It was weird and awkward.

"Excuse me." He said. "Do you think that this is a time for plot convenience?"

"What?" I asked.