Light and Dark

Chapter 12: Independence

2 years old, Leru thought with a sigh.

Leru and her brothers had reached the age of independence. They would leave Anaiyu today and venture out into the forest and start families of their own. Leru was very nervous. As a cub, she'd wanted to leave so badly, to be independent. But now, she didn't want to.

Leru knew her brothers felt the same. They just weren't showing it.

"Mother, I'll miss you," Shade said, his bottom lip quivering. He was making a huge effort to not cry. Deep down, he wanted to pounce on his mother and sob. He didn't want to go.

"If you ever need anything, and I mean anything, you give us a yowl," Jinkx told Anaiyu. He was trying not to sound too concerned about his mother.

Ifrit said nothing; he just kept to Anaiyu's side, breathing in as much of her scent as he could. He wanted to remember it for as long as possible.

The family was sitting outside the den. Anaiyu and Ifrit had their backs to the entrance, meanwhile the other cubs were facing it. Leru gazed up at the kapok tree longingly. I remember climbing up those branches, she thought sadly. She remembered all the games she and her brothers had played in amongst those tangled roots. Leru even remembered where her first claw marks were. She looked to one of the biggest roots, which was one of the sunniest. I fought Jinkx for that spot, she thought with a smirk. That was the time when her brothers respected her, were impressed with her, and were proud of her. She had sunned there so many times, and was dismayed at the fact that she'd never be able to sun there again.

Leru walked towards her mother. As she neared, she took a closer look at Anaiyu. Upon closer examination, Anaiyu looked older than Leru had realized.

Anaiyu had gray fur around her muzzle. Her pelt had some gray fur here and there, too. Looking into the eyes, Leru could see her mother's eyes had started to dull. The adventure and determination that had once been there appeared to have been burned away.

Leru nuzzled her mom, tears streaming down her face. Upon hearing their younger sister crying, Jinkx, Shade, and Ifrit all started to bawl as well. They all huddled around their mother and buried their muzzles in her fur. Leru was sobbing the most, breathing in her mother's scent. I understand why Ifrit was doing this now, Leru thought with a sniffle.

Anaiyu looked at the sky, her four cubs huddled and sobbing around her. She closed her eyes, and prayed, Please Aqua. Please protect my cubs as they flow out into the forest on their own. She opened her eyes and huddled in with her cubs. She was so proud of each of them. They'd grown up to be very honorable jaguars. She chuckled as she thought of all the cubs they'd produce. But she stopped at the sudden thought that came to her. I won't be around to see any of them.

Jinkx was the first to stop crying. With a serious look on his face, he wiped his tears away with his paw, and sniffled. "Someone has to be the first to go," he said to them all. "So I'll be the first." He went up to Anaiyu and nuzzled her for the last time. He then turned to Shade and Ifrit. Jinkx smiled and said, "Be safe. May the Jaguar Gods light your path." Then lower he added, "You are the best brothers I could ever have." With that he nuzzled them and turned to Leru. "Please lil' sis. Take care of yourself. You're an albino; you're  special. And you've made me proud to call you my sister, Leru," he said as he buried his face in her fur. Then, he padded away to the bushes and left.

As soon as Jinkx had left, Shade and Ifrit looked at each other and nuzzled Anaiyu. Then she asked, "Are you two leaving together?" Leru winced at how scratchy and tired her mother's voice sounded. "Yup. We figured it was best if we looked out for each other," Shade nodded. "We love you, Mom," Ifrit added. They then faced Leru. "Never forget you had two awesome brothers like us," Shade joked, trying not to cry again. "We won't forget we had such an awesome sister like you," Ifrit said, smiling. They nuzzled their little sister, and turned towards the field. They then walked into the tall grass and disappeared into the trees at the other end.

Leru stared after them. She felt suddenly alone. Her brothers had left, and she was about to leave herself. She wanted to run, to get away now before she wouldn't be able to make herself go. Before she turned around and flung herself at her mother, begging to stay.

"Aren't you going to go, too, Leru?" Anaiyu asked. Again, Leru shuddered at her mother's scratchy voice. She turned and was saddened even more at her mother's expression. Never had Leru seen Anaiyu looking so depressed. Her eyes were glassy, and it frightened Leru. She'd never seen her mother cry.

And she was not going to see her cry today.

Leru ran towards her mother and nuzzled her even more. Through her quiet sobs, Anaiyu whispered, "Listen to me, Leru. You are an albino. Promise me that you will live a prosperous life that leads you down a path of beauty." She pulled away and looked her daughter dead in the eye. "And fall in love with who you love," she told Leru.

"Live strong, fight strong, die strong."

They both recited the jaguar code in unison. Leru wiped her face with her paw and stood up.

"I love you, Mother," she whispered.

"And I you," Anaiyu rasped with a genuine, warm smile.

After returning the smile, Leru turned around and walked towards the bushes. If she was lucky, she might be able to follow Jinkx's scent. She might be able to catch up with him. As she neared the bushes, her heart felt empty. Leru was fighting the serious urge to go back. But she kept her legs moving and she stepped into the bushes, leaving the kapok tree for the last time.

Anaiyu gazed after her cubs, looking in both directions. She heaved herself up with a grunt. She hadn't realized how old she had gotten. She wouldn't be able to have anymore cubs..... But that didn't bother her. Anaiyu had given birth to four strong cubs, one being an albino. A legendary albino.

Aqua, protect my cubs, she prayed. She slowly crept back into the den and curled up into the nest, missing the ones who'd slept beside her for the last 2 years.