Forbidden Glance

Chapter Six: Tal Snow

Elroy listened to his brother speak. He smiled at the fact that he still spoke the same, very passionate with every story he told. He use to hear stories when he was younger about his doings around London, some were weird, but most were fascinating. And here he was telling them about what he had done in prison, and one thing set Cole back. They heard Tal say that he had accept Islam and that he became a convert in prison. Elroy saw nothing of it, in fact he was pleased because that meant that they'd let him out sooner for good behavior.

"So what your a proper Muslim now?" asked Cole. Tal gave a nod "So what does that mean you can't even shot no more?"

"Yeah that and whole lot of other things." That's good thought Elroy "and I wanted you both to join me." Cole spluttered he had the mind to leave, but Elroy sat there quiet it was him who his brother aimed at "What do you say Elroy?"

"I'll need to think about it if I'm honest."

"Don't think on it too long." He smiled at his brother "How's mother? She well?"

"Yeah, she's fine." Elroy wanted to ask why he had a scar on his forehead but he thought it would be best to ask later.

"You let me down you know," said Cole "I had major plans for when you came out," he swung on his chair as if something was nibbling on his rear "na man ..." he lost the calm he usually had which startled them both.

"Chill out, what I've done is for the good. I can't be living that life no more." He looked to Elroy "You remember the madness, looking out my window every time I got yard hoping no one saw me."

"Na prison made you soft. I took you for a real G." This was his breaking point he stood up and left the room. Elroy stood up to join him, it was his ride home but his brother grabbed him tight on the arm.

"Let him go, he wasn't a true friend."

"What do you mean?"

"I learnt that, good friends are the ones who correct you when your doing wrong. And the bad friends let you continue, because they think that ... " he took a deep breath, his eyes glimmered with hope "they think that if they can't fix themselves then neither should you."

Elroy had learnt from his brother more than he had learnt from anyone else, the years between them never mattered. Tal was more than a brother to him, he was a father when he didn't have one and a friend when he needed one. What separated them two now were bars, once his visiting time ran out it would be over again. Elroy would go back to being the lone wolf, he accepted himself for it. But now and then things overcame him, things which he couldn't handle alone. "Thanks bro, I appreciate it." he managed.

"Don't start balling on me." smiled his brother, "I'm good here."

"I wanted to know about the scar, how did you get it?"

"This?" asked his brother as he hadn't noticed "I was in the gym and walked into a metal pole."

"You don't need to lie to me." Said Elroy he studied the scar it was a lot deeper to be a graze or a healed cut, even stitches weren't as bad. But his brother chose to keep it a secret for a reason, a reason he did not know. Maybe if he were to know it would be a lot worse. A police officer came and told their time was up. Tal hugged his brother once more and returned with the lady. Elroy watched his brother until he was out of site before walking back with the officer. Cole wasn't there and neither were his friends when he left HMP. He didn't know what hurt more, the long journey home or his brother returning to the cells.

3:00 pm, he was boarding his bus home when he remembered that he had to go to his grandma's house. It was on the other side of town and the journey so far had exhausted him. He felt the urge to go home and tell his mother he finished late, but his grandma was ill. When he was younger his grandmother would never leave his bedside.

He had countless text messages and missed calls from his university friends, he ignored them all. There was a lot on his mind and he knew he could speak to his grandmother about it. No one else listened like she did. His mother would listen but she'd tell him all the faults with his ideas. He had many things he wished to do but he did not do it because he was always told You're not ready. His brother never really helped much either he was hardly there -like his father. But it were cold days in the middle of december when his grandmother would come over to stay in the christmas holidays where he spoke about his plans until the next day. All the while she'd listen and agree and give ideas as they huddled besides the fireplace; just them two. She was getting weaker each year and he felt it. He noticed by her prolonged cough, then she'd hide the blood with the back of her hand, but Elroy could always see a red sticky string trailing behind. He'd ask if she was ok, and she'd reply yes and they'd continue. She turned 67 now, and it was day of her birth. He did not celebrate it like the others, they were glad she had survived another year. But to Elroy, she was a year closer to leaving for good. 65, 66, now 67 he could not believe it, he wished she remained 63 when she was fit and healthy but like most of his wishes it had not come true.

When he entered the room, it was not the same atmosphere as the previous parties. There was still a barbecue in the garden, balloons and confetti but people were hushed. There was no music being played, there was nothing. His heart raced as he walked into the living room, perhaps she died. When he entered and past the crowd, he fell to his knees. His grandmother had lost a lot of weight and her hair were a few limp strands. For a moment he thought the woman who lay in front of him with a tube in her mouth was not his grandmother - his grandmother's eyes would twinkle.

"Leave us," he asked not having the strength to face them "Leave us now!" They shuffled out the room. His mother who he hadn't noticed until then closed the door. He pulled a chair over and sat besides her bed. Her hand was hanging backwards from the railing, he grabbed it and cupped it under his mouth. She lolled over a weak head, and he looked into her grey watery eyes. "How are you grandma?" he asked, battling against his own tears. Her reply was a mumble, he shook his head in disbelief she was so eloquent with words they'd pass her mouth as easy water from a bucket. "Remember how I told you I wanted to become a real estate owner? Well I've got an interview tomorrow," he laughed "soon I'm able to buy you that space house we talked about. Maybe when you get better we can go on a trip just like the doctor - ok maybe not like the doctor..." her lip curled to what he took as a smile, and her hand gave him a soft clinch. "I had so much to tell you," by now he could not stop the tears, neither could his grandma "I wanted to tell you if what I was doing was ok. I might quit Uni for this job, also father hasn't spoken to me, Tal's in jail what should I tell him. Also ... I ... I wanted to know if everything will be ok?" He received no reply, the room was no louder than what it was before. But he felt her strength through her slender fingers curled around his hand slowly tensing. She could hear, but she could not reply. She coughed, and this time she had no strength to hide the blood, he grabbed a tissue and wiped it from the side of mouth. "You don't have to talk grandma. You can listen, just like before. The world is different now you see. YOu were right, things turn a lot sour when you're older. I've met a lot sourer people which I'd love to tell you about but." he stroked her head "I'm stronger now too, I can fight my battles. I've learnt to use my mind like you said," his mother walked into the room carrying a wet tissue "I've also helped mum, trying to help Tal."

"That's enough Elroy, there is a queue outside waiting to see her."

He checked the time, he had been there for almost an hour. He got to his feet and gave his grandmother a long kiss on her forehead. "We will talk some more, I promise." He hugged his mother on the way out and walked past his family waiting outside the door. He never cried in public and he told himself he wouldn't cry now. His uncle and aunty had caught him by the door, he was in no mood to talk. He just wanted to go home and sleep.

"Elroy, why you leaving so soon?" asked his uncle, he had plate full of ribs. He offered one but Elroy refused.

"Don't you want to celebrate your grandmother's birthday?" asked his aunty, gently tugging him into the house by his coat.

"I've already celebrated her birthday- the right way." he freed his arm and left. He buttoned up his jacket and made his way home, where a night of PlayStation awaited him.