What His Heart Wants

Chapter 1: Reminisce

Shay~

You never think of losing anyone you love, at least not intentionally. Maybe to death, but not actually have that person remove themselves from your life. It's like that person you love and know is alive, but at the same time dead. I've been there, heck I'm still there. The one man I ever loved, and that I thought loved me back just up and left one day. Never wrote, never called.

Sure I know he's alive, I mean come on the whole world know's he's alive. He went on to live his dreams, and I must say he really has made a name for himself. Yep, every time I turn the radio on, or the T.V. I get a painful reminder that the man I love is far from dead. " And here's the new hit single on KZ107, for all you Cash Arwin fans this one's called 'Reminisce'.

" I close my eyes and I'm taken back to a small town, with a brown haired girl, pretty blue eyes...'' I click the radio off and sigh, as I continue on my way to the high school. A pang of envy hits me as I pull into the familiar parking lot. I see some of my students hanging out by the double doors waiting until the last minute to go to their lockers, no doubt.

I pull into my reserved parking space, and glance back at those double doors, only this time instead of Rhonda Peterson, and Jake Keslo standing there, I see a young version of myself and a boy with shaggy blond hair waiting by the steps...

Flashback to 10 Years Earlier~

" So today's the big day.'' I say twirling a lock of hair between my candy apple red painted finger nails. I look up into bright green eyes and my heart does it's familiar flip flop. He smiles and I swear the angels above us are singing a song just for him.

" Your gonna do fine Shayley baby.'' He croons, nuzzling my neck while taking both my hands in his. We're standing in front of the schools double doors for the last time, this afternoon at the football field we'll all get a shiny diploma and proceed to grow up. I'm a nervous wreck though, I've prepared my speech for Valedictorian but I've never been good with public speaking.

" You have way to much faith in me Cash Arwin.'' I say playfully smacking his chiseled chest, he captures my hand and brings it to his full lips kissing my knuckles gently.

" Shay, it's a big job but someone's gotta do it.'' He says grinning through each kiss. I can't help but smile, he always knows just what to say to make me feel better. " Now give me a kiss and let's get this day over with.''

Flashback Ended~

It was the last kiss he ever gave me, I let out a long sigh and opened my eyes. It's the same parking lot, just a different group of teens this year. I run a shaky hand through my hair, and tell myself that I'm just shook up because I heard his song on the radio. I tell myself that the songs I've heard him sing aren't about me, or us and what we use to have, but I know better.

I grab my bag, and follow the path that leads to the teacher entrance. I've tried moving on, and even though the ache is not anywhere near what it use to be, it's definitely still there. I walk into the teachers lounge and swipe my time card, Martha Reeves a woman that is nearly ten years my senior is standing by the coffee pot looking down at a paper and smiling.

She's the new principle this year, and so far the changes she's brought to Hill Crest High have been good ones, ones that not only have improved the quality of learning for our students' but also have given our community a major economic boost. Yes, I really liked this lady and felt her presence here was needed.

"Good morning Shay.'' She said looking up from the paper she's reading and smiles warmly at me. I give her one in return, and grab my mug to fill it up.

" What have you got there?'' I ask, adding cream and sugar to my coffee. She grins and I can feel excitement dripping from her.

"I'm guessing you haven't checked your email this morning?'' I shake my head no, and she jumps right in, "Well I'm looking at the school newsletter, and guess who's school got picked out of thousands for the for The Rock out Graduation Concert?'' I nearly choke on the hot liquid, when she had ask me to sign our school up for the The Rock out Graduation Concert I had never in a million years thought Hill Crest High would be the one picked.