Joma: Learning to live.

Everything is caving in. Chapter 4

"Hey why are you trying to call me?" I say.

"Umm well I needed to tell you tomorrow night I'm going away."

"Okay where?" I say.

"Well I'm going away with Caspar to Australia for the Joe and Caspar hit the road thing."

"Right so the first night of us being at our new home together  your going to be away in Australia with one of your best mates."

"Yeah. I didn't want to tell you like this I was hoping we could meet up in person." Joe sighs.

"Alright then how long are you going for?" I ask.

Theres a long pause.

"Just over one week..."

"Huh, right. Listen I need to go um to to go have dinner. See you" I lie.

"I love y-" I cut him off.

I flop down on my bed not knowing what to think, not knowing if i should shout, laugh, cry or just sit there emotionless. I don't even care about dinner so I just brush my teeth took some medicine and got into my bed that doesn't seem as good as it was yesterday.

*The First Day Of Winter*

I wake up thinking "Oh my god this is the day I have been looking forward to for months" but then I remember what happened last night and that I'm going to be living in a completely different place on my own for a week. At nine o' clock Joe is supposed to be coming round to pick up my things with me but he doesn't show up.

I go downstairs for some breakfast and explain to dad what happened last night.

"And that's why I didn't come down for dinner." I say.

"Maybe you shouldn't rush your relationship."

I drop my spoon in my bowl smack my cup down on the table because that really ticked me off how could my dad say something like that when I'm trying to seek some supportive advice.

"Alright stroppy girl."

"Excuse me I don't care what you say this is my relationship and I haven't rushed it I've been with Joe for four years and I know I can trust him he has a busy life and sometimes he may need to go off and do things for his job!"

"Can you really trust him when he doesn't even show up to help you!"

"Maybe he is stuck in traffic or there is delays. Why are you so angry today usually you would help me in a situation like this." I say

"Have a think Emma!"

We stop shouting and the house goes silent. Today is the day mum died five years ago.

"Mum."

"Exactly."

" Why are you so upset this year, you weren't like this any other year." I say.

"Well this is the year and same day that your going off with your boyfriend to live with this is the day that you had an argument with him." Dad says a lot quieter.

"So that doesn't matter that has nothing to do with mum."

"It does because the last thing I said to Charlotte was an argument and then the next time I visited the hospital she was dead!"

"Oh..."

The door bell goes at the worst time because my dad is upset and I'm rather annoyed that Joe isn't here. But when I go and open the door the person standing there is Joe looking as hansom as ever; with the winter morning sun shining behind him. He steps through the door as soon as he sees me and gives me a hug. I'm not hugging him back though.

"Emma I am so sorry I'm late the train was running behind and I'm sorry about yesterday I wasn't expecting to be gone at this point-."

"Shu'up." I pull away from the hug that he is giving me.

"What?" He says puzzled.

"Shut up! It has nothing to do with you if anything it's my fault. I'm sorry I cut you off last night and threw a strop. I should be saying sorry."

He smiles a thanking smile and pulls me into yet another hug but this time I hold on.

The thing with my life is when something bad happens something good happens afterwards. The good is the bandage and the bad is the scar.