Writer's Diary

Day Three: A Speech

My social studies teacher, Mrs. Cevlin, announced me to the class: "Aspen will be giving her speech from an angry pre-revolutionary war colonists point of view now, so you all need to be quiet and respectful." I barely heard her, though I did understand it was time to stand up and give my speech. I was shaking on the inside, the constant fear of my classmates disliking and rejecting my speech and I made my insides numb and my head to spin. I had never felt this nervous before any sort of public speaking, and just last Friday I was super psyched to give this speech, so why was I so uneasy about it today? Doesn't matter, I just need to focus on giving this speech as eloquently as possible.

I stood, trying to look confident, though on the inside I was shaking like I do when I'm up high. I have never, ever, ever liked heights, and the only reason I do roller coasters or zip lines was to appease my friends and family, I never got any personal enjoyment out of it, and still didn't understand why other people did. I felt like I was about to go off the high dive at the college pool near me for the first time, and it sucked. I love speaking in front of people, and am very dramatic. No, Aspen, focus.

I cleared my throat, and began: "Hello, classmates. I stand before you to give you a speech." Was that too formal? What if they hate my speech just because of that? Oh my gosh, what did I do?

I pressed on, "But before I begin said speech, I have a favor to ask of you. Please close your eyes, and imagine what I say: in England, you were poor, the lowest of the low. You finally landed a job as an indentured servant, and embarked on your journey across the sea with your new master and high hopes. Upon arrival in America, you worked without pay for ten long, hard years." Was that too dramatic? I bet that was. Why did I ever think this was a good idea?

I didn't stop, needing the good grade, "Then you were free! The future was yours, yours to shape any way you wanted and suddenly every exhausting, back-breaking, grueling, strenuous, and arduous day was worth it. You were soon a successful merchant, hawking your wares on the cobbled streets of Boston, living in and listening to the flow of the city, its river of prosperity washed over you and soothed you, a balm for every injury you ever sustained. You were happy here, in a way you never have been." You know what, Aspen? you are not going to make it to the end of this speech, not without doing something to stop yourself from being such a edgy, jumpy wreak. What comforts you? Words. Words are good. Especially your own words, which might be conceited, but whatever. Immerse yourself in the flow of your own words. You are a word weaver, so wrap the blanket you wove around yourself.

much more confident, I sustained the flow of my threads: "There was a war after a few years, you didn't fight though; you just sold food and clothes to the army. Although you didn't fight, you knew a bit about the war, and one of the most important facts to you was why you loved being a British citizen: Great Britain promised to pay for the war, there would be no extra taxes imposed upon you." The words, the words, you are looking at a bit of your soul, like that Paul guy said in On Writing. You know why people practice speeches in front of mirrors? To see that soul more clearly. Imagine you are in front of a mirror, and let the words spill, and soak their ears.

"That promise was soon broken, stomped on, and dragged through the mud. Taxes were raised impossibly high! You were soon put out of business, a combination of people smuggling which took away from your business, and the high taxes, and just like that, you were on the streets again, cold and alone. How could Britain expect you to pay taxes for what they said they would pay for? Especially after closing the Boston Harbor and stopping trade. You were angry, rage consumed your heart, flowed freely through your blood, and festered in your mind. Britain ruined your life, and you could do nothing about it. Even just looking at a British soldier made the fire in you flare up." wow, I was loud back through that, like I normally am. Whatever I'm doing, it's working. Keep thinking the thoughts you have been. Wait, shouldn't I be looking at my audience? You know what, I barely got to where I am now, why complicate it?