LOVE DOT

Love Dot ~~> 1

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I'm empty.

.

.

I don't know where to go.

I don't have any relatives to go to....

            I'm an orphan,

but someone took me there when I was 7 years old.

I'm thankful to this person whom I call Dad.

He gives everything to me, the love, the happiness and the care that only a Father can give.

Only way I could repay him is by showing him how much I love, respect, adore him and by giving importance to all the things he did for me even though I'm not from his blood.

But my life has shattered when the man I called my father died, that his cancer slowly tortured him to death.

We tried to save him but it's too late.

Everything changed since the day he died.

Now I'm back to being empty ..to be alone, with nowhere to go, no one to run to...

I thought that this would be my life forever,

that's why I turned to the wrong path...

I hungered for people's attention not knowing that I'm becoming another person, that the wrong side of me is taking its turn, and slowly taking over me.

I turned to liquor, peers made me feel special, I learned every messed up things that most bad teenagers do to suffice their needs of attention.

 I joined sororities....

we do mess up things together,..

stealing,

smoking,

taking drugs and more.

I feel so special when I'm with this so called group of peers not knowing that I was slowly changing myself to someone that I don't even know.

*****

The First day I got to school..

I sat behind a weird looking nerd guy.

He was staring at me all this time, and then suddenly I felt a little sleepy.

I lay my head on the desk knowing that this guy was still staring at me.

I was about to fall to sleep when suddenly someone grabbed my blouse and shouted

 "WHERE IS YOUR TEXTBOOK!? AND WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING DURING MY CLASS!?",

I just stared at him and answered, "None, and why would I care?".

After he shouted at me he commands me to go and wait at the back for my punishment.

Every time that this is my subject, same things happen...

 and every time I was to be sent on the back I stare at the window and think about my Dad.

I badly miss my Dad,

I know that I was not the same person he loved years ago and I wasn't the person that he wanted me to be, ..

my tears want to fall all this time then suddenly my teacher grab my shirt and his stick slapped my back.

I felt pain...

I wanted to cry....

I wanted to shout....

But... I don't want to!

I need to look strong so that I won't feel alone again.

 After the punishment, I return to my seat and once again I lay my head to rest and slowly closed my eyes,

 then suddenly someone whispered into my ears "Are you ok?",

***