Homestuck one shot collection

Upon This Ledge

Triggers: Suicide, death, sadness, held in feelings

Wind blows through my hair, moving a platinum blond strand into my face. I move it back and close my eyes, trying to hold back the tears. My face, my pale cheeks feel like they've been covered with salty drops. I put my foot away from the ledge, intending to step off and end my life, but something stops me.

"So Strider, fancy seeing you here," a voice interrupts, making me turn my head and look down. On the roof by my side is (Y\N).

"Go away," I mumble, turning my head as she climbs up next to me.

"Were you planning on jumping?"

"None of your business," I grumble as she sighs.

"Care to tell me why?"

"I have nothing left," I say, closing my eyes. A part of me wants to jump, get out of this conversation. I hear a sigh, and I watch with wide eyes as (Y\N) stands on the ledge and goes to take a step off. "Jesus Christ!" I shout, grabbing her arm before she can fall and pulling her off the ledge. Once I know she's safe I step down and grab her arms, shaking her. "What the hell did you think you were doing?" I ask, eyes wide. (Y\N) doesn't answer me and reaches up, pulling off my shades and setting them on my head. When I go to put them back, she stops me.

"I'm going to ask you a few questions," she says simply, "And eyes are the windows to the soul, so I'll know if you're lying," she says, tilting her head. "You were going to take your own life?" she asks, blinking. I sigh, and nod. I can't lie anymore. "Well if you were going to end your life, what does it matter if I die?" she asks.

"People care about you," I say, frowning. "Do you know how many people would miss you if you were to jump?" I ask, tears in my eyes. I hear (Y\N) chuckle and place both hands on my cheeks, keeping me from turning my head.

"You just said the speech I was going to say to you. Dave, if you take this jump you're just opening a door to grief and regret. Karkat, Dave, Dirk, Rose, Roxy, Terezi," she begins naming people. "First off, you know Karkat would blame himself," she frowns, shaking her head. I hug myself by my waist and look down. Suddenly she moves away from me and stands on the ledge, making my heart beat in fear. "So, are you going to do it?" she asks, not looking in my direction. I reach out and grab her hand.

"No," I say, putting my glasses back after she nods.

"Strider, is there anything you want to do? Anything I can do to help you?" (Y\N) asks, blinking.

"Well, there's this girl," I say, blushing. (Y\N) grins and begins pulling me towards the door.

"Then I'll help you get her!" she chirps, "What's her name?" (Y\N) asks, looking back at me. Panic grasps me as I stutter.

"Terezi," I say quickly, making (Y\N) blink and nod with a smile. It was today, the thirteenth of October, in the year 2013 that I made this promise. I promised to stay alive to (Y\N), the girl I have feelings for. And it was today that I lied and told her I had feelings for Terezi.

It took a year, but I finally was dating Terezi. But something was wrong. She wasn't the beautiful (Y\N). The Kind (Y\N). She wasn't her. I feel bad, continuing to date Terezi when I wasn't ever into her, but I guess that's life. Today (Y\N) walked in on us sucking faces while I mumbled lies about how I "Really fucking loved her". It was awkward, but she played it off. A part of me wanted her to feel upset. To tell me she loved me... No, instead she smiled and walked out while apologizing. To be honest, I hadn't seen much of her after that. Hell, we didn't once see each other after that. But I would always hear good news from John, who would keep telling me she didn't hate me. I felt like I couldn't believe him. But I got over it, and I kept her promise. I want her happy, I want (Y\N) to feel joy.

I now stand on a ledge, a piece of paper in my hand. Wind blows through my hair, moving a platinum blond strand into my face. I move it back and close my eyes, trying to hold back the tears. My face, my pale cheeks feel like they've been covered with salty drops. I put my foot away from the ledge, intending to step off and end my life, but something stops me.

"So Strider, fancy seeing you here," a voice interrupts, making me turn my head and look down. On the roof by my side is (Y\N). A small smile works its way onto my face as I sigh.

"You just won't let me die, will you?" I ask, turning my head to stare down at the ground. "This is a shitty way, you know," I begin, "To greet someone after not speaking to them for a year," I say as I clutch the paper tighter.

"Quite a way to speak to someone as well," she points out, I can hear the smirk in her voice. "Now do I have to stand up there with you to prove a point?" (Y\N) asks as I shake my head and step down, not choosing to look at her. "Strider?" she asks, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"I love you," I mumble, looking up. I move my shades and look her in the eyes. "I really fucking love you (Full name)." I see her tear up a bit and smile softly, placing her lips on my cheek.

"I love you to, Strider," she whispers. I close my eyes and slowly feel her presence disappear. I open the paper in my hand and tear up some more. Today is October thirteenth, 2015. On this day two years back the woman I loved kept me from jumping. And two years later she did it again, even when she's not with us. That's right. Two nights ago I received a letter, which was found by her hanging foot. In it, she addressed to me her feelings. She loved me and I never knew. She loved me and still wished me best with Terezi. She was found by John who proceeded to call the police, then Karkat and Kanaya. It was those two who relayed the message to me. I hold her letter to my chest and close my eyes, sitting on the ledge.

"I really fucking love you," I whisper before feeling myself cry again. On the ledge where it all began, she stopped me again. My little guardian angel who I never got to say goodbye to.

Holy shit I am so so so so so so sorry. I got this idea while packing up my room, and I had to type it. So yeah, I'll try a better story next time. Again, I'm sorry. And, if this affected you in any way, please message me and we can talk it out. I just wanted to try Sadstuck, and I feel like it was a mistake. But yeah, I'm here for you all. Dave is owned by Hussie, as well as any other Homestuck character. I don't own the art. Thank you for reading and I'm sorry.