Filling your Daddy's Shoes

Chapter 12: Sipping the Pain

January 16,2017

Jay sat on the barstool sipping beer.

"Erin,D...Do you know where my Dad is?" asked Grayson

"He didn't come home last night. Damn it."

Grayson walked into the living room and sat on the couch. Shane sat in his room and looked at a picture of him and his Dad.

"I love you Dad." He kissed it and then looked down on the dog tags. He put it around his neck.

Jay kept sipping his pain away,

"Can I have another beer?" asked Jay

The bartender turned around and handed him two beers and a shot glass.

Erin called him, He glanced down at his phone and ignored it.

"He's still not home is he?" asked Grayson

"Gracie,I'm sorry."

"This isn't your fault. I mean it's none of our faults. I know when my Mom died I wasn't ready to talk. I'm still not ready. I'm sorry He lost his Dad,and now my Dad just gives up on us."

"Gracie,Don't say that he did. He's just in a bad place right now. I know where this is going for him. It happened after his Mom passed away. I saw the pain he had in his eyes it wasn't a good thing to see. I know where this is going for him. It happened to me, I saved my best friend I helped get her to the other side and She was killed. And I went through a rough patch but I had your Dad here to help me."

Flashback

"Kyle! Throw the dang ball!" yelled a 13 year old Jay

Kyle chugged the ball at Jay
"You are going to pay!"

Jay threw a ball at him.

Jay's Mom came out the house.
"Boys! Lunch is ready."

5 years later
Kyle looked down on his son and smiled,then He kissed his tiny little head.
"Jay,I'm gonna miss you." said His Mom

"I love you Mom!"
Kyle and Jay walked towards the plane together. Punching each other on the way there.

Amy stood in the room of the doctor's office looking at the screen. She cried and smiled.
"I wanna know." The nurse did the ultrasound.

"Amy,It's a girl."

"I gotta call Jay." Then she remembered He wasn't home.

5 years later.
"Shane,Come see bud." said Jay

Shane walked over to his Uncle and climbed on his lap.
"Jay,You sure you can help me raise him?"

"Kyle,I wanna help you out. I'll raise him. And I'll do a damn good job."

End of Flashback

Jay remembered the times with Kyle and just sat on the bar and cried. Then he kept sipping the beer. He was drunk.

"Hank,Can you go to every bar in the city and look for Jay. I'm watching the kids."

"Erin,Leave the kids there. I'll go looking with you."

Erin walks near Shane's room and stops in front the door.
"Shane,I'm gonna go look for Uncle Jay. I'll be back."

Shane sat on the bed and cried. He never felt like this before. He felt numb. He sat up and walked out the door.

"Shane,Erin left. Dad isn't here. And I'm really worried about him and you."

"My Dad the person I loved most he's gone. I never did think it would happen to me. My Dad,he was a Hero. He was my Hero. He saved lives and that's what I wanna do."

"Shane,When my Mom died I wasn't ready to talk to anyone but Know that I'm here for you,and you can talk to me anytime."

"Thanks Gracie."
Shane smiled for the first time.

"Wanna go to the Firehouse? Reese invited me over there."

"Yeah. We can walk there. Leave a note though."

Grayson sat down and wrote a note saying that They left and went to the firehouse.

They walked the block to the firehouse.

"Hey Shane! How's everything going?" asked Hermann

Shane just stared at him.
"Who's That?" asked Kelly

"Grayson,She's Uncle Jay's daughter."

Everyone stood there and looked at Gracie.

"Jay has a Daughter?"

"Yeah."

Erin walked into the bar and saw Jay sitting on the stool sipping the beer.

"Jay,Get up."

"Erin,No. My best friend was killed."

"Jay,That gives you no reason to do this. Jay,He would want you home raising your Kid and raising Shane. I know How you feel. Jay,You can't do what you did after your Mom died. I know what happened. Please Jay,Shane needs a dad in his life. He needs you to raise him. Kyle wouldn't have put you as his legal guardian if He didn't think you could do it. Jay,You are here for a reason. Jay,Come on. Let's go home."

"I'm not going home. I'm going to sit right here and sip this beer. You can go."

"Jay,this ring. Can be yours again. The engagement is off. I can't keep picking up your broken pieces, Jay doing this is not good. Shane and Gracie,they need someone to raise them. It's not fair to them. Shane lost his Dad and you are here acting like you are the only one who lost someone. I'm done Jay."

Erin took the ring off of her finger and place it on the bar.
Jay glanced at it then kept sipping the beer. Erin got into her car and drove to her apartment,she said on the couch and watched tv.

Shane and Grayson sat on the couch watching TV. Gracie got up and went into her room and fell asleep. Shane sat on the couch and waited for Jay to come home.

Jay grabbed the ring and left the bar,He walked to Erin's apartment. He knocked on the door.

Erin got up from the couch and walked towards the door.

"Jay,What are you doing here?" She looked confused.

"Erin, I love you and I want you to have this back." Jay hands the ring back,Erin doesn't budge.

"Jay.... You reak of beer. You gotta go raise Shane and Grayson. You can't do this to them. It's not fair. Jay, They need a Dad. Shane just lost his Dad and you were sitting on a damn bar stool sipping the pain away. That's not fair to him. Grayson,You are her Dad are you can give a crap about her at the moment. Jay you took the responsibility to raise them two. You can't give it up. I hope you realize it. I said the engagement is off and I mean it. Jay, You need to realize you are losing the most important people in your life because of this. I love you but I just can't at the moment." Erin closed the door on his face,then opened it back up and kissed him.