There is a time scale that you use before loving someone hurts. Once you get mid-way you start preparing your heart and mind for the inevitable. The light shines like a glow at the end of the tunnel. It's neither threatening nor comforting; it's neither reassuring nor disturbing. This is not as simple as black or white or even darkness or light but rather a radiance and silver lining to the twisted things thought. How did it feel to be in her shoes? Lonely, at that very last moment, the decision is made and all fate takes it's stand on the podium. The roads were dry but we slid round corners, each word echoing the first, each sentence contradicting it's last. "You should go". The funny thing, mind you far from humorous, was that it all felt too similar. I remembered the bridge and the lights, the summer time feeling in winter, the firsts and the lasts, the stares and the glares from everyone who cared. I didn't teach you to fight, I just showed you there was a war amongst us, I didn't teach you to cry I just said that those emotions inside can't be held in forever, and I never taught you to let go, you just learnt that pain is less excruciating when you don't hold so tight. They may blame me for your calluses, red eyes and battle wounds but I say that's all human instincts. We glow together because in the best darkness truth shines. When you have had enough you blow your own candles out, sometimes to wait for the wax to set other times so that you can sit in the darkness and pray to never see light again. Self-destruction, they call it. But who are they?
Who are we to pretend we never saw this coming when we took to the land and was carrying things beyond our weight? She feels misunderstood and rejected, passed on and forgotten. The bottom of our small glasses should reach the ceiling before we admit to our failings, I know what we will become I just can't say it aloud. Do you remember walking with me through the forests of our nights and questioning my actions, you said why do you look behind so much? How did you know those shadows were harmful? Why do you care so little when those around care so much? And I whispered, I don't. That Is perhaps the reason why I have continued to fall, I think this is my time to be caught but I feel so far from me that I can't wake myself from pity and so therefore watch myself turn it into nothing. Self-destruction, they call it. But who are they?
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Unwonted. By Eli Oko
Short Story7 stories, 1 perspective. A written self reflection of a character that struggles with the expectations of those in her surroundings. Only thing they don't know about her is that in every story there's a link. As the links connect they presume they...
