thoughts

silence is a pest

the breakage of my heart is a never-ending story.
the echo of your hissing words sting and make my ears ring when they cycle nonstop in my mind, in your sweetly hurtful voice. your unyielding ways are something i cannot stand most days, but still, oddly, i cannot get enough of you. the uncontrollable love in my heavy heart cannot give you up. whether this is the correct path or not, i do not enjoy hunkering down such a trap. the burning, lonesome stare in my damp eyes, have you not noticed it? it occurs when i envy certain encounters, such like our old selves; our old innocence. i dedicate this stinging stare to you, hoping you observe it, and bring to mind. nonetheless, i am taken over with hostile hopelessness every time i pass you by and you don't speak a word. i fight against the tenacious urge to release tears. how do you not see the blatant lump in my throat when ignored by you? for crying out loud, can you not hear me crying out to you nights on end? i cannot bring myself to comprehend what silent monstrosity is happening nowadays, between us. i can't be settled, until we are. i miss you being home. now you've kicked me out, you're just a temporary shelter im attempting to seek. was i a letdown, simply a pest you wished to be rid of?