My friend Stephanie has been bugging me to read some webcomic called Homestuck for a while now. Or at least watch this one certain flash. So I guess today is finally the day I watch it.
I don't really know what I was expecting. I'd never read any of Hussie's adventures. I mean, sure, I'd seen a couple pages of Problem Sleuth, but it hadn't really been my cup of tea. But I went through Homestuck's log for about a couple hundred pages before deciding that would take forever. Let's just Google this shit: [S] Jade: Wake up.
All right, there it was. Click. Random girl sleeping. Jade, most likely. I arched an eyebrow as the screen faded to white and revealed...rainbows, sparkles, and bubbles. Along with an eardrum-assaulting melody. Everything a dorky girl could want? Sure. I sat in misery, watching these squids come onscreen, along with shrimp. A stupid, crazy dance party ensued. The bed started floating in a pink and purple sky. Then the image floated away in a bubble. Thank goodness.
But oh shit, it wasn't over yet. A guy wearing pink dramatically removed his cool shades. I decided that I'd get some shades like them. He seemed like a cool kid, and he had red eyes. That was pretty neat. The bubble came floating back, red, with a squid. Oh God why? I thought. What was it about bright colors and 'innocent' things that was so ominous? Somebody new joined Jade (who was riding a narwhal); she had fins and horns, and was riding a sea-pony. A new song played as well, this one even more obnoxious, if that was possible.
A sense of uneasiness arose in the air. The rainbow filled scene started spinning, the background flashing and sputtering, the music changing eerily. It blinked out like a TV turning off, and I held my breath. Just as I once again, naively, thought that was the end, a low throb reminiscent to a heartbeat sounded. The screen flickered, snowy, and startled, I saw that my lamp was flickering too. My laptop throbbed and flickered, speeding up with every beat. Alien creatures seemed to be popping out of the screen. They appeared to come closer and get scarier as red flashes and white pulses joined the insanity.
'Stephanie,' I murmured. 'The kind of psycho shit that entertains you...'
It flashed to white again, but at this point it had made me feel like it was over too many times. There was more. The image of an alien resembling the Kracken flickered on the screen, and I could tell something was horribly wrong in the way that it was irregular, and the music sounded distorted. Then it stopped, replaced by a sinister version of what I recognized to be the theme of the Midnight Crew.
Jade's bed floated onto the screen; she was lying dead and bloody on it, with a squid (which I now knew was actually called a Squiddle) hovering above her with a murderous smile. The Kracken alien's many...eyes, I guess, were glowing yellow like the moon outside. What the hell was I doing watching this at night, anyway? Fading onto the screen, glowing like a candle, was a phrase in a bloody, red font:
Horrorterrors kill you.
But even that was not all. Bear with me.
As I shut the laptop off, frightened pretty badly, I watched my lamp completely turn off, and the TV slowly turned on. At first it was a faded, snowy screen. Then the image of the Kracken alien (horrorterror?) blinked into sight. A soft noise like millions of voices put into a rewind-loop thing started up. Then, one single, demonic whisper.
'You've been warned.'
