November 21st, 2015.
That, was the date of the very first snow of the year. The first snow without her.
Tiny, airy snowflakes made their way down leisurely, blissfully ignorant of any care. Our world is a tad too bothersome to face, so they would really bother.
It's been four months.
August 13th, 2015.
Since that dreadful hot day of august, when she disappeared forever. Her intense form; gone in a fleeting moment.
Much like the way the snowflakes did, as soon as they came to land in the loving arms of Serbian grounds.
Nobody informed us beforehand. That was her thing. Always. The news of the fall of white web had come from random sources.Much like the ache it bore.
The first months without her complaints. Suddenly, all those small (and big) rumblings about the freezing snow, extreme indoors heating and nosy neighbour seemed far away- and earnestly, missed.
Where have all those endless phone calls gone to? This year, the arrival will be bitter. For there will be no homemade kisses, hugs and desserts. This year, the arrival will be bitter, as the darkness of the empty apartment rips through our tender souls.
Oh how I dread that arrival.
How to face an empty home? A home always full of love and light? A home with a noisy and temperamental woman who never took no as an answer?
This year will be difficult. Much like the first day of loss.
The moment the snow will have been shaken off our boots, and our luggage settled; the moment when reality kicks in.
Then, a new mourning will arise. Because this will be the first time in all our lives, that she will not be home.
Oh, how I dread that day to come.
