It was over.
Louis and Harry, and everything that they had together…they were finished. There was nothing more that needed to be said and no more reasons to talk to each other becausethey were over.
And that was that.
It was over.
Except, even though it was over, even though there was nothing between them anymore, Louis still couldn’t get Harry out of his head. Not that it was easy. One Direction were still everywhere; in every shop and on every music channel… But it wasn’t only that. It was in the way he automatically went to add two sugars to Eleanor’s tea, instead of none – because Harry liked it that way – and the way he automatically turned to tell Harry something before realizing he wasn’t there.
It had been a year and, in theory, Louis had moved on. He had a job, he was going to university and he had a beautiful girlfriend who he loved. He had met new and interesting people – people like Ryan, his flatmate, who was now one of his best friends – and he should have successfully gotten over Harry.
Except he really, really hadn’t.
And maybe that was why he was thinking about Harry and how not over Harry he was instead of listening to Eleanor who had stopped mid-sentence to stare at him with pursed lips.
“Louis?” She said her voice edged with annoyance. “Are you even paying attention?”
Louis shifted guiltily, and looked away, a flush of shame creeping up his neck. Eleanor deserved so much better than him, he already knew that. She was the kindest, funniest and sweetest girl he had ever met and he should feel so lucky for being able to kiss her whenever he wanted to except…
He didn’t love her. He loved her like one would love a sister, but nothing more. He had been living in denial for the last few months that he had been with Eleanor, convincing himself that he would grow to love her back.
Louis didn’t know what it was – he had thought that after talking to Harry he would be able to move on. For some stupid, stupid reason he had believed that all he needed was closure and once he had that he could get past Harry and start living his life properly again.
“No,” he finally admitted when Eleanor was still looking at him expectantly. “I was distracted.”
Eleanor sighed a little, her shoulders slumping. Louis noticed for the first time that she looked tired. She was still as pretty as ever, but there were bags under her eyes and exhaustion in her face. “Are we going to talk about this?” She asked, averting her gaze from Louis’. When the boy said nothing, she shook her head slightly. “Don’t worry about it,” she muttered, looking down at her books on the table that had been spread out when Louis had come over to study with her.
For a long time they were silent as they worked, only the sound of rustling pages interrupting the quiet. The tension in the room was almost tangible, and Louis could barely bring himself to glance at Eleanor. He could feel her stares boring into his head.
“Louis,” Eleanor said, her voice soft. “Louis…can you please look at me?”
Louis’ eyes guiltily flickered up to meet Eleanor’s and a rush of shame swept through him as he saw her hurt expression. She was so wonderful, so genuinely beautiful that it almost hurt when he looked at her.
“Are you okay, Boo?” She finally asked, her hand coming to rest on top of Louis. The nickname almost made Louis wince, and memories involving Harry came crashing back into him. “You’ve been distant all week and –“
“Do you love me?” Louis asked suddenly, his heart pounding against his chest. Eleanor’s eyes widened slightly, the shock readable on her face.
