The Beginner's Guide to Popularity

Mature Food Fight

"...Srina Conufal!" I won. I won the Spring Dance Draw! How incredibly cool is that?! I walked up to the stage and received my prizes. The boy winner was called. Some Junior with glasses. The John Barker News Press team rushed up to take our picture. They hurried away. A scream was heard from the crowd. A girl's scream. No surprise: Melissa Louis. She pointed her manicured finger at me.

"Sheeeeeeeeee's not supposed to win! I am! I win everything! How can she win! It's not fair! She's a loser and I'm the winner! See? I win! I win! I win! I win! How could I not win?!"

I wore a sash and crown. A lot like prom. She sashayed up the stage stairs and slipped. Crazy pumps. She groaned in a high pitched manner. She swiped the crown, sash, and card, and smiled a fake smile at the crowd. "See, everyone?! I always win! I'm supposed to win! Win! Win! Win! I was born to win! If she won, the balance of the universe would be ruined!"

Mrs. Ryland got angry with a capital A. "Melissa Louis! Get off the stage! Srina is the winner! You won't always win. Get used to it!" Melissa sashayed off. She was angry. I owe Mrs. Ryland a lot. I got my prizes back. Melissa grabbed the chocolate fountain and hurled it at me. Chocolate all over my dress and sash. Andrew then did the sweetest thing. He poured the punch bowl on Melissa. Thank you Andrew. Keith got the salad bowl and chucked it at Andrew.Big surprise.

A Freshman boy dumped the salsa on a Senior girl. The girl poured the nacho cheese into Melissa's dress. Melissa screamed the loudest scream ever. "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!! You guys are disgusting! Why do I even go to this school?!" She and Keith left. Everyone involved in the food fight got detention and had to write an apology letter to the janitor. Including me. That night, Andrew and I had to walk home.

"I'm sorry about what happened tonight. I thought this night would be fun. " he said.

"Me too."

"It actually felt good to pelt Ms. Popular in Punch."

I just awkwardly cracked up right then and there.

Andrew hugged me and shut his door. Whoo hoo!

On Monday, Apparently Melissa dropped her letter on the ground and I found it.

Dear Mr. Whatever- your- name-is,

I'm sorry I trashed this stupid school because some stupid girl won the Spring Dance Draw. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.Whatever whatever. I was forced to write a stupid note but who cares? I hate this school and there's nothing you can do about it.

Whatever,

Melissa

Nice letter. Very enthusiastic. A+. How thoughtful to a guy that cleaned up nacho cheese, salsa,salad, and chocolate. Everybody was congratulating me for winning on Monday and talking about what was now called the Mature Food Fight at the Spring Dance.