Dean.

One

I am done.
None of this matters.
No one cares.

I look around my room. Everything is just as it should be. I am living with a really nice family who rents out their basement to college students. I was so happy to take it, but everything just got worse. My mind was spinning, I was seeing things, I was struggling every single day, and I was sick of it. So, now, I'm leaving.

My room is just as it should be, everything is in the right spot. My bed is made, and I left a note on my nightstand, thanking these kind people for all they've done. I filled my backpack with provisions. Just some clothes, some cash, snacks. My cell phone is right next to the note on my nightstand. I won't need it.

With one final look around the room, I turn my back, and leave, without another word.

The bus leaves at midnight. It's heading west, towards St. Louis. I'll take it as far as it goes, and then I'll walk. My mind is just blank, everything is numb. I don't feel anything. My eyes are dry of tears. No feelings of regret, or, anything for that matter. I actually smile as I climb the stairs onto the bus, and walk to the back. This will be a long ride, but that's good.

I stare out the window as the bus speeds down the highway. The scenery slowly changes as the hours pass. We stop several times, but hardly anyone else is on the bus. They all look just as lost as I probably do.

I get out my journal, and write. I've always loved writing music, but I just never had enough money to buy a guitar. Maybe I'll get one in St. Louis.

The thought of going so far away is exhilarating. I can feel my whole body waking up, and a numb, sick smile stretches across my face. Feelings are so strange. Most of the time, they don't make any sense. And I've often wondered where my feelings go when I don't feel anything at all.

Days pass on the bus. I don't really ever have to leave. I don't really sleep either. But, there's a bathroom in the back so I don't really need to leave. I have food, so when we stop for food I don't really need to leave then, either.

It's the third night, and the driver said we'd reach St. Louis by morning. But... Something is odd. I just can't out my finger on it. We're passing through a forest, and as I look through the window, I get this awful feeling in my stomach. It's kind of panicky. I feel my heart speeding up, and my eyes are wide as I stare out into the forest. It's so dark. Something is wrong. Something is very wrong. I try to ignore it, but it's hard. I feel like a startled deer. I feel like a mouse, trapped in a cage. I have this idea in the back of my head that something is out there, and we're like a meal on wheels, just waiting for it. I'm stuck. I just feel like I need to get out of this bus. I have to. I have to. I sling my backpack over my shoulder, and head up to the front. As I walk, i glance at the other people in the seats.

They all look terrified as well. Something is really wrong.

I hold on to the rail and slowly make my way up to the front, but just as I do, something Rams into the side of our bus.

Hard.
I hear a crash, like the breaking of glass, and I hear a scream, coming from the driver's cabin. The bus slows down, and starts shaking. Something is in the cabin with the driver, and I feel my heart start beating so hard I'm afraid it will explode.

Without even second guessing myself, I look around for an emergency exit. When I spot it, I kick it open, and jump out the side.

Without looking back, I sprint into the woods, and hide in the bushes to see what's happening.

What I see, is so shocking, so disturbing, I empty my stomach of the little food I've eaten.

I can't take this.

A dark, shadowy figure is walking through the bus. I can't really make out what it is. It's hunched over, and has long, ugly fingers  with gross, skin like stuff coming off of it. I start shaking. With my past history of schizophrenia, I've always had trouble with determining reality from fantasy, and this seems so real, I can't take it.

My heart beats so violently I'm afraid it is going to explode out of my chest. The creature appears to be looking through the seats, searching for someone. For some reason, it doesn't hurt anyone there. Suddenly, it looks out the window, and right in my direction. I don't really know if it has eyes, but I can feel it staring at me.

A cold, panicky feeling takes over my body, and a shiver runs down my spine. I feel like a rabbit, and that thing is chasing me. I'm stuck. My eyes dilate, my breathing becomes increasingly rapid and I want to run but I'm glued in place.

The thing starts to leave the bus, crawling through the same window I left through. It has such fluid movements. This weird... Energy is coming off of it that gives it the strangest effect. This has to be real. It has to be.

I turn around, and sprint the other way, just as I hear a car pull up. I look back, just in time to see the creature bounding after me.

Oh shit.

Breathing.
Why is breathing so hard?!?
I just keep running.
I dont look behind me.
I can't.
I can't breathe.
I can't see. It's so dark. These woods are thick.
One glance, and I swear I'm dead.
Oops.
I carefully look over my shoulder, but I don't see anything. My feet still trip over a branch, and I tumble to the ground. My heart is beating out of my chest, and I can barely see. But nothing is chasing me.
I heave a sigh of relief, and lie there on the forest floor for a moment. Then my body immediately stiffens, and I jerk up. I know it still has to be out here. It has to be. And it's trying to find me. I reach for the gun in my back pocket and pull it out. I shakily load it while my eyes quickly dart around the thick wall of trees.
Maybe I can kill it. I get to my feet, even though my legs complain about it. I force myself to start walking. I carefully creep through the forest. It's the middle of winter. I can see my breath and feel my fingers freezing. Why didn't I pack god damned gloves?
I shudder as I feel something. It was the feeling of seeing it on the bus. I slowly turn my head to see it. It's absolutely terrifying, somehow it's a darker black than I've ever seen, almost sucking me into it. I raise my gun.
"Stay away!" I say, forcing my voice not to shake. It doesn't move. "Y-yeah! Thats right!" I say, the fear becoming apparent in my tone. Before I can react, it lunged toward me. I feel something sharp rip across my stomach and I hear a gunshot. I feel the weight of the creature for a second and it's gone. I feel myself falling but I don't stop myself. My ears are ringing and I struggle for a minute to stay conscious. The warmth of my own blood covers my abdomen and I shakily lift my head out of the snow to see the wound. My blood has stained the snow red. I can barely look at it. I cover my mouth in shock, keeping my gag reflex from making the situation worse.
I stop when I realize I'm not the one who fired the gun. I also realize that the creature is gone. I lift up my eyes to see a man standing about 20 yards away. He stands there frozen in shock for a moment, before another man breaks the silence as he bounds through the shrubs.
"Dean! Oh my god, I thought I lost you. Did you get it? How did-"
The other man lifts up is hand, silencing the man blurting out questions. He points at me.