Life isn't Fun

Sunday night 11/29/15

I got into a fight with Carter and Alan last night. It was online so it's not like anyone can do anything about it. They kept calling me things like a slutty ass hoe. I really don't care what they think of me, but last night it didn't keep me from wanting to start crying. I just kept telling myself Maggie don't, don't cry. No matter what I do, the guys in this damn town just want to find something about me to use so they can make me miserable. If people read this or knew any of what I'm writing down, they'd just make fun of me or say I'm being dramatic. I might be a dramatic person. When it comes to stuff like this and how I feel, trust me when I say I am NOT being dramatic!

I also really am sorry for how I've been treated Melanie (aka mom) today. She trusted me to have my phone back so I could call Kathy. Kathy is my biological mother, she left me and my dad when I was two and my dad was in college. I ruined it. I ruin everything. I just had to go and text Carter after he stole Samuel's phone and tell him what I think about the things he said last night and also in the past. Mom read it and I ruined her night. I feel terrible right now.

I'm pretty sure that tomorrow every guy in the school is gonna know about the fight. Future reference... don't piss off a jock. This is seriously what I get for standing up for myself.

11/30/15- Monday morning.

I am really scared right now. All morning I've been running the possibilities through my mind of what Carter has planned. Right now I'm SO happy that I only have to deal with him in 3rd hour and maybe at lunch. I swear to god if he says one thing about my life I'm going to report him. AGAIN. Then I'll be sitting there laughing when mom calls the school after I tell her.

I'm really really pissed at Caroline right now. All of last week I was gone. I came back Wednesday just to here all of the stuff she was saying about me. She acts like nothing happened and everything is okay. It's not. I have to work with her in science for our project. Thank god Ryan is in our group too. She doesn't even apologize for anything. I gave her the chance like three times but she just kept saying that she didn't do anything. She didn't even care that the things that she says when I'm not there can and will hurt me.

My best friend is also going through a time of mental depression. Her's is way worse then mine so I really shouldn't complain. She actually went in and is getting help from a professional. I'm choosing to handle my situation differently.