This I Promise You | a.i

Chapter 1 - I miss her, we all do

                  

Ever since mum died, life has just been a complete series of mess. Let's start with the fact that dad left Michael and I. Yep; I know what you're thinking. What a dick. For starters he was never really in the picture anyway. He was always in and out. Never really paid for rent or helped mum with anything. He never came to school events, family occasions or my dance recitals.

It was always mum who made the effort to do things for us kid. She cared. Unlike that idiot. Who used us for money and a roof over his head, so that he wasn't living out on the street.

He had taken advantage of me and mum never saw it, nor did I tell her. I could never have told mum what he did to me. And now, I will never have the chance to. He was a bad father. Well barley even a father.

I felt sorry for Michael. He didn't have a dad to show him the rights and wrongs of boyhood. I got mum, he had no one. Mum only knew so much. Ever since he was young, probably started the age of 9, he would be cooped up in his bedroom playing video games and never come out unless it was time for dinner, or going to school.

Well, that's if we were even lucky to get him up and out of bed in the morning.

He hated the idea of school, and the people. He felt different and felt no need to be at school. Which is complete shit talk because education can be a very important thing, but obviously not in Michael's mind.

When he turned 16, he dropped out of school and got a job at the local grocery shop. Mum was never happy with the idea, but she couldn't help but feel bad for him.

Even though I am a year younger than Michael, I'm probably the most mature out of us both. He is like an 8 year old stuck in an 18 year old's body. But that's fine, because it's only rare when I have been able to see him smile lately, since mums passing anyway. 

Life hasn't always been easy for us two. We never had the kind of money to do much. It was only on rare occasions that we would go see our grandparents, or if our Aunty Cass would take us to the festival every year. The family could see how much mum was struggling, and they tried the best they could to help her out.

Once mums cancer came through, we knew that we weren't in a good state. Michael would drive me to go visit mum at the hospital. But every time we visited, the worse she looked. We would both sit there with mum, holding her hands and telling her how much we loved her and that she needed to be strong.

But she would always tell us back that we were the ones that needed to be strong.

I hate to think of the moment mum lay there not breathing. The fact that she was right in front of me and I could do nothing to help her hurt me the most. Michael would hold me and tell me that everything was going to be okay. Which in reality. It wasn't.

After 'dad' left us behind... again, we packed up all of our stuff and that's when Aunt Cass took Michael and I in. Which means her home is our temporary living space until we decide to move out.

It's been a year now and I miss mum, we all do.

-

Sorry if it's short ........