Never Walk Alone

Chapter 16

      My days became lonely a while afterwards. I began to feel as if I was starting over again; just the quiet girl in school, preferring to be left alone and secluded. Except I didn't enjoy the loneliness anymore. Instead of a quiet silence that hugged me, the loneliness made me feel like I was left in an open field. It clawed at me; sometimes it became so unbearable I would go out to the pond while it was raining and cry my eyes out along with the storm clouds up above. The beauty of the outside was breathtaking, but there was no one to admire it with. Darren was becoming faint, and I couldn't do anything about it. Personally, I was scared of making him emotional. He was like a bomb and I was the countdown that was the lifeline of his existence. I had to stay far away while he recooped.
Music became my main passion. I listened to music for hours on end that went with my mood. I tried to be imaginative in my free time, but all I could think of was a friend named specifically Darren, who I needed right about now and for the rest of my life. I forgot about Garrett for the moment; he never hung around Darren. But maybe he was afraid of setting him off, too.
During classes I sat and stared into space. My thoughts sprang with ideas, but I quickly dismissed them. They wouldn't be as good without someone to be the perfectionist of the ideas.
I took on a young group of girls who were currently the only ones I had to look forward to. They were good, I guess. I never trusted them with my secrets or emotions, but they could cheer you up. Darren stayed alone in school. One week, he began to not show up. I figured he must have been going through the motions again. But when I got a surprise phone call from him one evening inviting me to his house, I took up on the offer of course and figured that I would help him out with things.
That evening Darren and I sat talking. When he explained to me he moved to another house nearby, I was surprised.
"Well, I guess it's good to start over..." I muttered awkwardly. It felt like we had just met. He looked off in the distance.
I nodded, not sure how to react. Had Darren and I really gotten so far apart that he thought there was no one for him? He seemed to realize what he said, because he cleared his throat and started that sentence over.
"I meant, that I just needed to start over, not-"
"Yeah, I know," I let it slide off of my shoulders. I had an idea then. What if I brought up our old memories? Would Darren be more like his old self? I figured I would at least try it.
I hesitated, "I remember when we first met,"
Silence.
So I began,"It was so awkward. I mentioned the backyard so casually, and you looked ecstatic to hear about it. I was surprised to find someone who appreciated the outside as much as I do! After that was the beginning of our friendship. The start of the best path I ever decided to go on. And the summers and the sunsets and the rain and the waterfalls and the clouds that looked like waves and the pretty yellow and purple flowers that sprouted up in between cracks in the rocks and- just my first experience sharing it with someone! Suddenly I never wanted to be alone again," I stopped. Darren was leaking tears, bent over, but he was not smiling. When I finished, he sat up to talk. He sat with his mouth open for a few minutes before beginning. But his words were not what I expected.
"You're not the first I've done those things with. Other friends have come and go; that's how it always ends for me," he whispered.
I looked at him in awe; I couldn't help it. I give him the most heartfelt speech and that's his answer. A doomsday message about the end of our friendship stating that it's "died" forever, then. I was simply his friend for a couple of months until he could toss me away and move on to the next friend.
Of course I left after that. Darren just stayed huddled out by his lake. I looked back and saw him in place, not moving an inch. I was alone again.

Author's Note

Hey guys! I figured I would do a little bit of an update chapter. So what did you guys think of this? And of course I'll continue to bring in new chapters! ;)