virgin ❥ jastin ~DISCONTINUED~

0.6

I had woken up this morning, letting out a drastic yawn, as I looked over to the left side of the bed. No one was next to me.

It got me sad as Jason left me here all alone and by myself, with no one to cuddle with. It was like half of me was empty when he wasn't here. Which was totally weird since I've never felt that feeling with anyone else.

I moved my blonde hair over to the side of my face, as fell over; to the front of my eye. I moved my feet so it was dangling over the side of my bed. I stood up, having the covers dangle of off me and I looked at my phone. It had some unread text messages, Instagram notifications.

I unlocked my phone, and saw a random number texting me "Hello Beautiful". It was so creepy and weird, I was thinking of just blocking them but as curious as I was, I texted them back and asked who they were.

My phone buzzed as soon as they sent it, "Jason" is what they replied all bold with black letters. My stomach began to do backflips as I read that one word. "Hello! I'm sorry I didn't know who you were :(" I said feeling kinda guilty. "It's not your fault, baby" he replied, making me feel a whole lot better giggling to myself as I saw the nickname.

"Can you please call me? So I know it's really you?" I sent to him.

Only 30 seconds later did my phone start ringing, I felt a little bit anxious as I began to answer it. (What if my voice sounds weird? What if he thinks I'm weird?! What if I say something wrong and he hates me?" ) Those were all the thoughts running through my head, I was really insecure about myself and this would only make it worse.

"Hello?" I asked, waiting for the voice on the other side to answer me. For me it was like waiting for paint to dry.
But in reality i was actually 10 seconds into this phone call. "Hello." The voice was deep and raspy, like he just woke up but I knew it was Jason. He always has this tone in his voice that can make you recognize him easily.

"It's me, Justin!" I said, really excited as it really was him! "Yes, baby I know it's you". He said to me, he sounded really grumpy which makes me sad because I want him to be happy. "Why do you keep calling me baby?" I asked out of curiosity. "Because I lo- Because your cute and adorable, sweet and loving and-" "Ok, I get it" I said with a happy tone in my voice. It was nice hearing compliments about me, I don't rarely hear it often but when I do it's usually when I'm being compared to my brother.

"Justin is a sweet boy and is so smart. But why can't he be more like Cody? Why can't he be more social? Or more athletic? He's like Skin and bone! And don't get me started on how childish he is".

It was what My Mother would babble about all day on the phone with her 'Girlfriends'. Each time he would come over from college or Every Time I was upstairs, thinking I was asleep even though I was really awake. I always tried and tried to be more like him and it would never work out, I would always fall back into my old ways and I could never gain any weight.

"Uhh, Justin? You still there?" His voice broke me out of my thoughts, "Um, yeah! I'm sorry" Damn it! What if think that I don't care what he has to say? Or that I find him annoying?

"You do know you don't have to say 'I'm sorry' all the time. You didn't do anything wrong" He said with concern in his voice. "I'm sorry, I'll try to stop" Oh fuck, I just did it again! I'm so stupid.

"Justin!" He told me, he was frustrated with me; I know he is. "I'm so sorry Jason. I-I'll try to do better" I said starting to cry, I don't like dissapoint ting people. Tears began to roll down my face slightly, as I sniffled.

"Are you crying?" As if he could see me, I just nodded and didn't say anything. The only sound you could hear was me sniffling every 3 seconds.
"Justin, please don't cry. You're so beautiful and I hate seeing my princess cry" He told me, reassuring me about this whole situation.

"But I disappointed you. You told me to stop saying 'Sorry' and whenever I said I would stop saying 'Sorry' I would say it again!" I began to babble on, the tears were beginning again. But more heavy this time.

"You didn't disappoint me, darling. You could never disappoint me and I never said you had to stop saying 'Sorry' just not all the time. Ok? "

"Ok" I told him, that made me feel a whole lot better. I was still crying though, don't know why.

"Can you wipe those tears off those face, baby? I don't like it when you're sad. I love seeing that damn adorable smile of yours" he said giggling. He sounded like a little kid, it was cute! It was like his voice was time traveling. Cool!

I let out a small laugh over the phone, which was completely unintentional by the way. "Here's that beautiful laugh of yours. Are you okay now, babydoll?"

"Yeah, I am. Thank you for cheering me up, no one really tries to do that anymore." I said as I began to change back into my hoodie, it was so cold in here. I should put back on the heat.

"What do you mean by that?" He said, his curiosity floated through the phone. "About what?" I told him, confused.

"When you said "No one tries to do that for me anymore?" He reminded me. "Oh? Um.....They usually tell me to 'Suck it Up' or stop being so sensitive, and also that I should stop crying like a baby and try being more manly" I said.

"Who's 'They'?" He told me, obviously sounding like he was mad or angry. "My parents,Friends basically anyone who is close to me" I told him, kind've like I was emotionless. "That's awful, Justin. They can't change who you are? Your such a beautiful person, they should be lucky to have you around" He said.

"But they are all older than me, taller than me, bigger than me. So, they have authority over me and My Parents? Well they are My Parents so whatever they say goes." I said

"Why would they teach you that? What's wrong- You know what never mind. I'll try to talk you later and I may come over, Who knows." He said trying to get this over with. That kind've made me feel self-conscious, Like he was desperately trying to end this call.

"Why are you leaving me? Please don't leave me." I said pleading for him to stay on the phone and talk with me more. "I'm not leaving you, baby. I just have to go to work. K? and I want you to keep smiling for me princess. No more tears." He said.

"Ok I will, Bye Jason." I said, I was obviously still hurt that he was hanging up but at least he had a reason I guess. " I love you, baby boy. I'll try to come over later." He said, hanging up the phone. It made a little decline noise as it sent me back to my home screen. I shut off my phone as I laid back in my bed.

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This chapter is boring, but the chapter after this one will be more entertaining don't worry! This is just like a little cute morning scene and then we will get into the more juicier part.
Oh and.

Justin's Insecurity Problem: The reason all starts with his parents. They constantly compare him to people whether it's his brother or not and constantly make him feel like he's not good enough for them. So when he starts to try to change he obviously can't bring himself to do it; failing miserably.

He's one of those people who also are perfectionists. So when he fails, he starts to act out by crying/panic attacks or anything else. So that's why he cried when Jason told him to stop saying Sorry even though it didn't seem like a big deal to Jason. It was to him because he keeps trying to meet people's standards and trying to be perfect even though he just isn't.

Have a happy weekend! ⛄️☃