By Candlelight ( a 1D FanFic)

Chapter 13: True Delusions (Briar's Dream)

Everything was extremely bright and out of focus. I couldn't make out what anything was. I was against a wall and could hear echoes of many different voices but, couldn't make out what was being said.

"Hello?" My voice carried.

I started walking along the wall, running my hands against it to guide myself. The further I went the clearer the voices became.

"I can hear you..." I said in a whisper.

I finally came to a door with voices coming from behind it. I slowly turned the doorknob and pushed the massive door open.

The room itself was massive in size. It was much clearer and less bright than the corridor I was in. I began to search for whomever was talking. In the middle of the room was a little girl with her back turned towards me. She was sitting on a colorful blanket with many toys surrounding her. I didn't want to startle her.

"Hello? Little girl?" I slowly walked  towards her.

She didn't reply but, there was something familiar about her. I was about 15 feet away from her when she turned her head to look at something. I followed her innocent gaze but, saw nothing. I  turned back to look at the little girl and she was gone.

The room changed before my eyes. It was dark and raining, I was outside. The only source of light was a streetlight. I began to walk towards the streetlight when I saw the little girl. 

"Sweetie, what are you doing out here in the rain?" I asked her as the rain fell steadily.

She giggled and ran across the street and into a house, my parents house. Suddenly it clicked. The little girl was .... me! I ran up to the door and opened it.

"You two are so adorable together!" My mother gushed.

I followed the sound of her voice into the dining room.

"Mom!" the young girl chimed.

My mind swirled. How was this happening? I was watching my 16 year old self melt into the arms of 17 year old Caleb. We looked so happy then. Time seemed to fast forward through all the good times, all the kisses, and all the arguments. I was pretty close to loosing my mind. I covered my eyes because I just couldn't take it anymore.

It was silent. I uncovered my eyes and regretted doing so. I could feel my heart break all over again.

"Oh shit!" Caleb screeched as he jumped out of the bed.

"What the hell?" I cried.

"Baby... i-it's not what it looks.." I slapped him across the face, shutting him up.

The house erupted with heckles and whispers.

"Ella was right about you." Tears streamed down my cheeks.

Caleb tried to explain why he was in the bed with his step-sister almost completely in the nude.  His excuse was that it was dark and he thought she was me. There wasn't anything he could have said.

I watched myself shatter into a million pieces. I sat down on the floor praying this would end.

The room went dark. Flashes of images appeared out of thin air. I was watching a movie of my life and for the most part the images were of me and Ella having fun. I smiled while watching this projection. A familiar voice came from behind me. I turned to look into the darkness in search of the source. In the distance, I could see flickers of fire... candles.

"You're a good person, Bri." The candlelight glistened around DJ as he spoke.

This memory was different. I could see and hear DJ but, didn't see or hear myself. The next memory was of both of the English men walking into my home. I never noticed anything other than their figures and accents but for some reason I was seeing the bigger picture. After the memory of falling asleep in DJ's arms while he sang to me with his sweet, seductive voice, lights started flashing. Things began to get weird. I was scared, I didn't want to leave this memory. I felt safe in DJ's arms.

As I stood there, the image of DJ and I began to fade. I needed to walk towards the flashing lights; as much as I didn't want to.

Why can't I wake up? I needed to wake up! I was in the parking lot of the mini mall. I didn't feel like myself.

"I suggest you kick rocks, Miranda." The words flowed out of my mouth.

I was forcefully holding someone back but, kept my eyes locked on Miranda. I was in Ella's body! I was holding myself back! I didn't understand. I was so confused. After a few minutes I felt myself relax.

"Let's go, Ella." I had said. 

I could feel the anger inside of Ella. I helped myself into the car. This was weird because I was seeing everything through Ella's eyes. I was doing everything she did.

I turned to face Miranda, well, Ella did. I felt my hands clench with the intent of using a fist or two. I lunged forward, planting a firm fist into Miranda's face. My hand throbbed with pain and I felt like crying. I had no control over my body, or Ella's in this case. 

I could hear a heartbeat and I was no longer seeing through Ella's eyes. I watched her car drive away.

In an instant, I was standing on my front porch.

"What the flying fuc...." I mumbled as I tried to wrap my head around this.

I needed to wake up NOW!! I knew what the next memory was and I didn't want to remember. The heartbeat intensified. I closed my eyes not wanting to see the inevitable.

The heartbeat had stopped, only to be replaced with the laughter of a child. Everything seemed calm inside my house.

"Hello?" I called.

"I'm in here." The little voice rang, followed by giggles.

I walked down the hallway, the child's voice was coming from the bathroom.

I opened the bathroom door slowly because this is where... where that awful man had attacked me. I soon discovered the tiny voice was that of the little girl, 6 year old me. She was sitting on the floor, brushing a baby doll's hair. I kneeled down in-front of her.

"That's a beautiful doll." I said with a smile.

She looked up at me with bright green eyes and smiled innocently. I knew the little girl was me but, I had a strange feeling. Something wasn't right about her. I stood and started backing away from her. I turned to run out of the door but, it had disappeared. Solid brick had taken the place of the door. I was trapped.

"WAKE UP!!" I screamed.

I was afraid to turn around to face 6 year old me. 

No way out. I couldn't escape the bathroom. I turned to face what I was so afraid of. My 6 year old self was levitating and basking in the most beautiful beams of light. Slowly she began to age. I watching the little girl change into a young woman that matched my exact real life image. The once glittering light had went completely red. She was floating above me as I desprately tried to find a way out.

"Please..." I sobbed.

I fell to my knees. She was my self image.... A loss of innocence.