Underneath My Clothes

Chapter 1

I wake up at seven in the morning remembering yesterday's incident. I remember how the old man tried to take advantage while giving him a lap dance. "What sick people," I thought. Even though I shouldn't have gotten as close to him as I did. This is my job, I've lost my 10 year old daughter in a car crash three years ago now, and since then the pain has still remained. I've tried to make myself forget about, not her, but the fact that I will never be able to see her again. Her smile, and the way she talked. The way she would try to make me smile after our my husband and I got a divorce. She was a strong girl, but she still left me.....alone....in the dark. I've been trying to find ways to entertain myself since then, but at the end this job was just a way to escape all that.  

I stay here laying on the bed a bit more before I have to get up to get ready to go to work. I work at Silicon's main office. I'm a secretary. As I put my woman's suit on and fix my hair into a bun, I remember about last nights incident. It just keeps replaying and replaying in my head. "What the hell is going on with me?" This was not the first time this has happened, but for some reason this....this thing stuck. Something about the way the man seemed, sad, lost, hopeless. The way he just stared at my face but not my body, the way he sat there mute. What was he thinking? Then suddenly from one second to the next, he jumped at me. I stood there defenseless yelling for help. I was lost, I was scared for the first time after my daughters death. I watched how the security guards took him out of the club, but I still stood at the same spot as before, motionless, speechless. "No, I shouldn't be thinking about this." I was about to go into my workplace and I need to forget about this. Nobody knows that I work at a strip club, and if hey we're to find out, I would get fired.

As I walked in Lucy greeted me in the entrance. We were the closest of friends in the office. If only things were like this in the strip club I thought. Here I didn't have many friends, but I got along with most. In the strip club, I was a nobody. I didn't get along with almost anybody except for Franchelsa which I barley even talked to. "Is something wrong," Lucy asked, "you seemed a bit zoned out." Yes.....no....was there something wrong with me? Was I loosing my mind?