Blossoming

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After a few months after our making friends thing.

We sorta were glued to each other, we'd eat together, he'd hold my school bag for me, he was more gentleman like than most children older than our age. He'd do everything for me. It was amazing, to have someone care for you that much, to have someone appreciate you and look at you like you were the only source of happiness they had.

Even at our young age we still knew that this wasn't something to let go of, this was something we needed to hold on to, something that we both knew never happened with other stereotypical 9-10 year olds.

He was my best friend.

Though in the middle of this happiness well our happiness, I forgot who I was crushing.
I forgot all about the person that made me who I was the happier, more positive person that I was when I was feeling down, my best friend, well my first best friend before the whole me and him thing.

In the middle of me being happy I left her absolutely alone. I approached her after realising this and she said it was fine, though I didn't quite believe her, I thought there was something off.

So I left her the way she was she seemed happy and this was a pretty dumb move but hey, I was 9. I wasn't sure wether to believe her or not.

I continued with my whole friendship thing with him and well things worked out amazingly, whenever I needed him he'd be there, whenever he needed me I'd be there too.

Until after a few months the negativity was starting to crawl back bit by bit, and it was all because of me being so stupid to actually believe what my best friend said, she started this whole thing with Vanessa, the girl who liked Noah. I know, I know this is some pretty complicated shit for a 9 year old but hey, things got real.

So as I said, she became friends with Vanessa, And I guess she poured out all of her misery onto her, she told her how she felt when I left her alone, how mad she was. And well she started ignoring me. She started leaving me out of things we usually did together. She replaced me but I guess it was a give and give situation because that's exactly what I did to her.

They started insulting me behind my back, talking about me, spreading rumours, they'd bump me into doors, but being the tough kid I was, I sniggered at them and told them phrases like.

"That's the best you can do, pathetic."

Or

"Really you're going to stoop that low."

And every time I'd tell them these words they'd sorta back away, and my "best friend" would give me a look like she was scared, and sorry at the same time. But they didn't stop, they continued and I still fought back I didn't give up, I couldn't give up not then not ever.

But as tough as I looked I still had feelings, I still experienced pain and I'd cry over this every single night of my life that this was happening. I didn't know what to do, I wanted to say sorry and stop this but at the same time I wanted to prove myself that I wasn't that easy to scare off.

So I ignored them but they just got worse, they started saying negative bs about me every time I'd walk by them, and I'd just look and grin, even though it hurt so much, I knew Noah would be there he comforted me he'd tell me.

"Everything's going to be alright, don't bother them, they don't understand you, Okay?, stay who you are and if they can't stand that then so be it."

And it felt nice to hear that from him I'd think wow, I am so lucky to have a guy that cared so much about me, a guy that could give up everything for me just to make me happy again.

I appreciated everything he did for me so much, a couple years went on and we advanced in classes, We were more mature at this time.

I still remember one day I couldn't take their negativeness anymore and me and my " best friend" got into a fight.

I was walking through the hallways of school and I entered our class there was only my "best friend" ok I'm going to stop calling her that lets call her Jane, so there was only Jane, Vanessa, and their other group of nasty little brats were in the room, I don't know what happened but Jane and Vanessa were crying so I stared what was I supposed to do?, one of their snarky little minions said.

"This is all your fault." she dissed.

"How, exactly?" I rolled my eyes at them.

"Really, how?, remember when you said don't worry I won't take what's yours?" Jane cried.

"Excuse me, I'm so sorry for distracting you and your" I looked over at Vanessa and said.

"Friend, but I have no idea why you're crying, because as I remember you didn't even want anything to do with what I had" I stated.

" No! She's talking about me, me and Noah were perfectly amazing friends before you came, but then you decided to show up and ruin everything!" Vanessa cried.

"Oh my god, you're crying over Noah? You're so sad, so you've been insulting me and ignoring me completely because of Noah!?" I said as my anger started to build up.

"He was mi-" She was going to reply until I cut her off.

"What, yours? Let me remind you real quick but he was never yours and he never would've been, in the first place so before you flood this room with your tears, let me say I'm done with your nonsense reasons and nonsense drama." I scoffed.

"Nonsense drama?, what about you leaving me for Noah? How do you think that felt like?" Jane replied.

"I directly asked you if you were fine and I said I was sorry, but you said you were completely fine and instead of trying to rebuild our friendship you didn't, you decided to be friends with this nonsense excuse of a friend, and decided to diss me with her, so that is not my problem anymore." I stated as I left the room.

Tears started welling at the corners of my eyes, I couldn't handle this anymore.

And what I did next was the worst decision I ever made in my entire life.

[] Authors note []

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