Hidden Secrets

This is Awkward

~ Living in the past is, at times, destructive ~
~A.M.

Finding that you're talking to your dad while he looks like a kid is the most bizarre thing ever. Then have him flirt with you, yeah that was nuts. Definitely for a dream.

"Argh . . . no Jon, sorry."

He pouted. "Tell me."

Wishing I could be immune to that face as I could before in reality I sighed, saying as sincerely as I could, closing my eyes, "I'm a dude . . ."

"What?" He exclaimed, horrified.

I bursted out laughing, earning an infuriated look, I grinned, pretending to act petrified, even though I had laughed at him already.

He threw the towel at me, like it was on fire and was incinerating in his hands, it sprawled across my face then slowly slid into my awaiting hands below.

When it hit the palms of my hands something in my mind felt like it exploded, scrambling all thoughts and memories. My mind hurting so much and so abruptly I took a step back. I heard stories about amputees who had phantom pains where their arms and legs used to me. That's how my mind felt - like my abrupt missing memories were aching.

And just like that it was over and everything was back to normal. Huh, odd . . .

"Are you okay, Clarisse?"

I nodded. Its Drew. I thought but couldn't say it out loud. "Yeah . . . sometimes in random moments my head like innerly explodes and scrambles stuff around. It happens but I'm okay. It just started a month ago . . . it'll pass."

He gave me a sympathetic look. "Sorry to hear that . . . shouldn't you get that checked out?"

I shrugged, once again, not my movements, I was just hostage inside an alien body talking to a younger version of my father. And I knew what was going in my head, that explosion in my head was what Mom explained to me when she had brain cancer. The nonstop headaches, I was experiencing them now. I had a huge migraine on the right side of my head, down to my neck, I rubbed the sore area.

"Clarisse!"

"Itzy?" I said, turning around, wondering how I knew the name and that Itzy was a name. Itsy bitsy spider was what I immediately thought as I looked at the pretty girl approaching me.

She looked like a model but somehow I knew her as not that type.

I found myself smiling as the girl came up to us, smiling herself, she checked Jon out, elbowing me in the side knowingly. "Ooh, Clarisse, who is this?"

"This is Jon. Jon. Itzy. Itzy, Jon."

"Hi." She greeted, wrapping her arm around my shoulders.

"Hey." He waved, smiling, but it was fake this time, I knew because I've seen his fake smile before, it was still sexy though.

WHAT THE HELL?

Did I just - did I just . . . just just t-think that?

Oh my God that's . . . terrifying I just said my dad was sexy - Drew! Stop it!

I pressed the sides of my head, faking it as a migraine, I groaned, but not in pain, it was in annoyance and dismay.
"Are you okay?"

I nodded, physically yes. Mentally hell no.

"You sure?"

"Yeah she's fine," Itzy assured. "She's just embarrassed that I'm here."

"Itzy . . . Shut. Up."