Once upon a time, there was a little, beautiful pig, who's name is Bacon. He lived in Las Vegas and was the richest, most powerful individual in the world. One day he decided to fly away to the Moon and rescue the Moon Princess from King Mars. He killed King Mars...but he didnt. King Mars wasn't who everyone thought he was. He was actually the Moon Princess' fetish. What that is exactly, no one has any clue at all. Because of this, the sudden marriage Bacon wanted to have with the Moon Princess became super complicated. First, they couldn't figure out if they should have the wedding on the Earth or the Moon. This didn't really matter though since King Mars still lurked in the shadows, and by shadows, this means a very dark place that would be illegal to access outside of the marriage.
After finally deciding to hold the wedding in a space station right between the Earth and Moon, they gather all of the guests, which are composed of the Moon People and Bacon's coworkers from the casino that he manages on Earth. Then, as he had his bachelor party in a bar the day before his wedding, King Mars appears out of nowhere in front of Bacon with four dudes holding shotguns. This left Bacon extremely surprised, not because he thought he killed King Mars, but he realized that the four dudes were not invited guest. Following that revelation, the four dudes, on the command of King Mars, start shooting at Bacon, but completely miss because their aim stinks, even though they're only five feet away. Taking this opportunity, Bacon activates the bomb deep inside his body that he planted in case something stupid happened.
As a result, the entire space station blows up while Bacon miraculously survived and descends down to the Earth. He soon crash lands in the middle of the Mojave Desert as he completely ignores the fact that he killed all his friends and fiancee. Unfortunately for him, King Mars comes out of nowhere and body slams Bacon from behind while almost completely burnt up. This starts an epic battle that barely lasts five seconds since King Mars ended up tripping on his feet and falls face first onto the sand. No movement happens as Bacon investigates and finds out that the reason King Mars fell was because he took the drugs that he normally sells on the streets, so he could endure the pain of re-entering the Earth's atmosphere. Taking into consideration King Mars' current state, Bacon decides to leave him alone.
Several days pass until Bacon's found back at the casino, although he's now searching for new people to replace those he absent-mindedly killed. One of the candidates was King Mars since he got fired from the drug business after using the product. Bacon was skeptical, but desperately needed someone for the job, so accepted him. Having made the choice to hire him, Bacon turns his back on King Mars to look for the appropriate paperwork to hire him. Seeing this opportunity, King Mars pulls out a shotgun and fires at Bacon. Sadly, his aim is also terrible and it bounces off a metal pipe that was right next to Bacon before heading right back at King Mars' head.
With King Mars dead, Bacon runs to him as he's overcome with sadness. Afterwards, he decides to take revenge on society because he blames guns for King Mars' death and believes that they should pay. This eventually leads to Bacon planting another bomb inside him, although this one is much more intense in power and blows up the entire planet with no chance of him surviving this time while the final words he says are "I am Bacon: The Avenger!".
The End.
