Joe Sugg/ThatcherJoe Imagines

Alone Pt2

He began to dance towards the table, plates in hands. I gracefully followed him and sat down to eat. My body no longer felt frail, my head was clear and awake. I was me again. And I was with him again. I sat and watched him as he effortlessly made the food I front of him vanish.

Even in the morning he looked astoundingly amazing. He stood up, as I followed, I felt his strong arms snake around my waist from behind and made me relax. I could feel his warm breath against my neck as he left gentile soft kisses along it.
"I love you" he muffled into the crook of my neck.
"I love you too joe" I sighed back.

Suddenly he grabbed my arms and forcefully spun me round to face him and pulled at my sleeves to show my scarred wrists.
"Why do you do this if you love me?!" He gently sighed, getting impatient. Then it came back to me. Last night. Why I woke up alone. I tried to stop it but it just continued.

"Joe we've had this discussion before, I don't want to talk about it again."
"But Y/N yo-"
"No joe! You know how hard it is to talk about for me!"
"Please.."
"JOE JUST STOP!" I began to loose it. He meant well but that boy was pushing my limit. My voice broke, as I shouted.
"WHY CANT YOU JUST TELL YOURSELF TO STOP?! IT YOU THAT HAS THE PROBLEM. IM TRYING, BUT OU KEEP SHUTTING ME OUT AND PUSHING ME AWAY." He started to shout back.

Tears began to prick my eyes so I legged it to the bedroom. He ran after me making shire I don't lock the door in his face. I just ignored him as he tried to grab me and made my way to my bed.

"I love you, I want to stop the pain but I don't know how. I don't want to see you like this!" He sobbed and he began to hold me in his warm embrace.

I didn't know what to do or say, my heart was telling me to hug him and cry and tell him I love him and want to stop. But my brain was saying I needed space and that I had to push him away again.

I stupidly went with my brain..

"Then maybe you shouldn't see me.." I croaked as I escaped from his grasp and sat away from him looking out the window.

"What do you mean?!" He asked surprised. I could hear a catch in his throat. I could tell he was crying.

"I'm too much trouble for you joe. I'm holding you back and keeping you from doing things. I don't want to be a burden anymore. So maybe we shouldn't have to see each other for a while. I don't want to shut you out, but I can't let you in. This is the only way. I promise you I still love you with all my heart and I'll never stop, but for right now. I need space and air, and to know that you're okay." I began to choke as tears poured from my eyes, causing them to sting. 

I heard him get up from the bed, tears streaming faster and faster from my eyes to the point where I couldn't see. I heard footsteps, as a blurry figure appeared in front of me. He crouched in front if me and placed my dainty hands into his.

"I don't want to leave you like this" he cried

"I don't want to put you the ought this" I wailed back

"Please let me stay, you're not and trouble, I love you!" I could now feel tears dripping onto my legs who's they were I wasn't sure of.

"The last thing I want to do is to get you to leave. But I'm all put of options. Neither of us know what to do." I sighed as my tears began to fall more gracefully.

"Then don't tell me to leave, I promise we'll think of something!" He pleased, wiping my tears from my face.

"Joe I'm not letting go of you. I just need space for now. It's not over, I still love you, I just want to be in my own for a while." I whined.

"You promise it's not for long?.." He sighed.

"I promise to the stars and back."

He stood up. I loved this man an didn't want to let his hand go.he was my safety, without him I was lost. But this was happening.

He planted a gentle loving kiss onto my forehead and walked towards the bedroom door.

It opened.

He took a deep breath and said..
"I love you Y/N and I'll be waiting for you at my flat. Just promise me you'll come to me."

"I promise to the stars and back." I whimpered with a small smile.
With that he left to his apartment. I broke down in tears as soon as I ears the front door close. He wasn't here to hold me and tell me I was okay, he wasn't here to make me laugh or to make me smile. He wasn't here. Instead he was outside walking down the street to his apartment, with tears cascading from his eyes.

I opened my flooded eyes as tears continued to pour. My face was red and blotchy. I had re lived last night and gone through all the pain of 30 minutes in 30 seconds.

"I'll be waiting.." I heard his voice echo in my head.

"And I'll be coming right now to stop you from waiting for me any longer joe!" I shouted determined.

I shot to my feet and ran out the door. I didn't care to lock it or take a key or even get out of my pyjamas. I just legged it down the street to his apartment.

I ran up the steps. Barged through the main door and legged it up the 15 flights of stairs to his door... 
--------------------------------------thanks for reading probs making a part 3. Also if you would like to check it out, I am currently writing another joe sugg fan fiction, it's called Number On A Coffee Cup, it's not and imagines like this, it's a proper fanfic with characters and everything. So go check it out if you want. Again thanks for reading, I love you lots, see you later,
- Lauren xx
Also you just read 1088 words!