My Side of the Field

Different

I had never thought that I would be in the same car with the three band directors again. For starters, they hated me, or at least that's what they gave off as. I had done so much wrong, I was still in disbelief that they had allowed me to be in the band.

The last time I was in the same car as them, I was getting picked up from the police station. Their words, that day, it was still engraved in my head.

I looked out the window as Mr. Bailey's white Pontiac pulled up in front of the police station. All three of the band directors were in there, and all were starring right at me, anger written all over their faces. I couldn't help but feel embarrassed and ashamed of myself and what my stupidity had brought me to. I had never felt so horrible before, until this day. My heart was racing as I awaited them. I swallowed hard.

The first to get out of the car was Mrs. Salvador, as I kind of expected, Smith and Bailey following right after her. I could tell she was more than angry with me, maybe furious. She disappeared behind the door, only to re-appear after opening it. Her face, I swear to you, I have never seen her as upset, angry, and saddened all at once.

"I have never been so ashamed of you Darla. I can't believe you and Gerson have done something so reckless! So stupid! Did you not stop and think of what the consequences were going to be? Did you really expect for those people to still stay with you? To still continue to be your friends and 'have your back'? They will never have your back Darla. Neither yours or Gerson's. All they want is trouble, and trouble is what they got you into." Mrs. Salvador said to me as she walked up to me. I felt like crying then and there. I had never ever felt what I felt that night. She looked at me in the eyes, and her face softened as a single tear rolled down my cheeks.

"I can't believe that YOU got into this..." Mr. Smith said, pity in his voice. "I expected better from you, but I guess my expectations were too high." He said before turning around.

"But... I'm... really, I..." I couldn't speak. I felt as if I was going to explode if I spoke one more word.

"I can't believe this. I'm going to wait in the car." Mr. Smith said before he walked out, slamming the door on his way. I sat there with my mouth wide open.

Mr. Bailey just looked at me, his eyes apologetic.

"Do your parents know about this?" Salvador asked me plainly.

"No." I said.

"Wait 'till they find out." She said angrily before we left the station.

I swallowed hard, and my heart raced as we got into the car and drove off.

My mind wandered back to the present. This time, we got into Mrs. Salvador's glossy blue Mustang and she took off like a bat out of hell. I looked out the window and watched everything pass by in a blur. I couldn't help but want to cry. I hated the fact that the only times I've gotten a ride from them is when there was something bad was happening or that had happened. The first time I was almost killed and now the second my best friend is dying.

We stopped at a red light, Mr. Bailey sighed angrily.

"Why does this stupid light have to be red now?" Mr. Bailey exclaimed before turning around to look at the window. No one responded to his question. I could feel myself wanting to break down and cry in that moment. Too many memories were being brought back from that fateful night.

"You're parents are going to throw a fit, and they have every right to!" Mrs. Salvador said furiously. We were finally in Bailey's car, and now we were, sort of, calmly driving to my house, were my fate awaited. "I still cannot believe this..."

"I'm really really sorry..." were the only words I could choke out.

"This better be the last time that any three of us give you a ride from such an atrocious place or anywhere else this bad, because the next time you do something this stupid and reckless, we will NOT be there for you." Mrs. Salvador said before turning back around to look at the front window. Tears were falling down my cheeks like no end.

That day, that thought brought tears to my eyes.

Well Salvador, here I am again, under different circumstances though... I thought to myself. I held in the tears.

Smith and Bailey's faces had no expression on them as we finally reached the hospital entrance. Salvador was extremely serious, and she almost jumped out of her car once she parked it. We all quickly got out and almost ran inside the building.

There, we were faced with Gerson's family, and instantly his mother came to us, hugging me first.

"My baby's dying!" she howled. I couldn't help but hug her and cry.

"I'm really sorry Mrs. Trey. This is my fault. I could have stopped him, but I didn't." I said, barely being understandable. I was sobbing uncontrollably now.

"No, no. Don't take the blame. This is not your fault. I don't think anyone could have prevented such a thing." Mrs. Trey, Gerson's mother, said. I looked at her in the eyes. They were filled with sadness.

"I could have. I could." I said, and she hugged me again. Mrs. Salvador, Mr. Bailey, and Mr. Smith just looked at us, their eyes watery and their faces anguished.

"Darla, he's been asking for you and the directors since he came in. He won't stop, he really wants to see all of you. Especially Darla." Mrs. Trey said, looking at me with wide eyes.

"I don't know if I'll be able to handle being in there." I whispered. I truly didn't. My best friend dying was something that I hoped never to see, but here it was, right in front of me.

"Please, this might be the last time you'll get to see him." Mrs. Trey said before breaking out in sobs again. I hugged her and she hugged me back.

"Fine." I said and I walked hand in hand with her to where Gerson was at. The directors were right behind us.

We stopped right in front of a room, room 387. I swallowed hard and looked at Mrs. Trey. I felt her hand squeeze mine and I saw her try to smile, but more tears fell from her eyes.

"Thank you." That was the last thing I heard from her as I entered the room.

Gerson was lying on the bed, IV cord in his arm and other wires all around him. He opened his eyes and looked at all of us for a moment before faintly smiling. I breathed in and then ran over to him, hugging him tightly and planting a kiss on him.

"I'm so sorry... I - I can't even deal with this right now..." I said, sobbing once again. I squeezed my eyes shut. I felt Gerson's hand on my cheek.

"Darla... There's so much I need to tell you... before... before I go..." he said, his voice hoarse. The directors were on the other side of the room. "And I need to tell you three something too." He shut his eyes, and slowly re-opened them. He smiled.