When we finally made our way downstairs flushed and awkward, Jake told momma we needed to talk to her about something important.
"Should I make coffee?" She asked raising an eyebrow with a cheeky smile looking from his flushed face to mine and I was certain she knew what we had just been doing up stairs.
"You're going to want something stronger." Jake said with a serious expression and her smile fell off so quickly it was like it had never been there. We all sat down at the dinner table with coffee's despite Jake's suggestion and Jake started telling her everything that had happened. She sat there quietly while he talked, only speaking a couple of times to ask questions which I would answer. Once Jake was done she stood up and got a bottle of kahlua out of the cupboard. She sat down at the table and poured a bit in her coffee, mixing it in with her finger. Jake picked up the bottle and poured a bit in his coffee to. I saw momma's objections die before they even left her mouth. As much as she was against us drinking, a rule which we had dutifully followed with the exception of Jake's 15th birthday, this was by no means a normal day. Not one to be left behind I picked up the bottle after him and poured a noticeably smaller amount into my coffee with momma watching over the top of her cup as she sipped. She put her cup down and smoothed her hair back, a nervous gesture I hadn't seen until this point.
"Firstly, do we believe this 'Mr Travern'?" She asked.
Me and Jake looked at each other, neither of us had even thought to question the authenticity of his claims until now, but I couldn't think of a single reason for him to lie about it, so I nodded. Momma nodded in response and took another sip thoughtfully.
"Secondly, this doesn't leave this table. We keep it to us and your father. Okay?" We both nodded without a seconds hesitation.
"Thirdly, Jessie sweet heart, we're going to have to find a way to convince your mother you're staying with us now. Do you think you can do that?" I nodded. It wouldn't be hard to find something to fight with her about, and I'd pretty much been living here for years.
"Okay. Jake I need you to organise a bag for Jessie, write up a list of anything she might need and I'll grab it from the shops. I have a couple of old friends I need to speak to." She stood up and put the bottle away. "I'd offer to drop you home but we need to keep things looking as normal as possible." Jake stood up and she kissed us both on the head. "Be careful, okay?" We both promised we would and started the walk to my house.
We got there a bit to early and decided to sit in the park across the road so that my mother wouldn't be suspicious. Sitting in the giant wooden pirate ship it's easy to pretend that things are easier then they are. I imagined that me and Jake where floating on the ocean, carefree and windswept, salt air on our faces instead of hiding out in a park planning the fight I was about to start with my mother.
"Do you know what you're going to say to her yet?" Jake said holding my hand and running his fingers along the tops of my fingers.
"I don't know, I think I'm just going to let it come out naturally. She makes me furious all the time, I just won't hold it in this time."
He nodded looking serious. He kissed my hand.
"Do you remember the first time we skipped school?" Jake asked me, a small grin on his face.
"I remember. we hid in here all day." I smiled back at him. "Eating the entirety of my birthday money in lollies." I knew he was trying to distract me, but I let him think it was working.
"Until I threw up on your birthday shoes." He laughed.
"Oh god! That's right." I laughed at the memory of a green faced Jake apologising through his hands about ruining my new shoes. "They didn't fit me anyway, mum never bought the right size for me."
"Remember the night we got drunk off my dad's old peach schnapps?" He offered up.
"Of course. Your 15th birthday." I smiled at the thought. "You tried to ride the neighbours dog."
He laughed with his head thrown back.
"I forgot about that! Poor old snowball." He shook his head. "And toor off my clothes trying to go skinny dipping."
"And I had to drag you home half naked with you telling everything you saw that you loved it." I remembered laughing.
"I didn't tell everything I loved it!" He exclaimed with his hand on his chest pretending to be offended.
"Yes you did! I remember. You kept looking at different things and screaming that you loved them, the road, the trees, a fence, your dad's car when he eventually found us."
He shook his head looking serious.
"Jessie I wasn't talking to the tree's, I was talking to you." He rubbed his fringe out of his eyes. "I just had a lot of trouble locating you with my eyes." He laughed.
"Really?" I wasn't laughing this time. Although me and Jake had always been close, we'd never told each other we loved each other. He looked at me and realising I was serious he tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear.
"That's why I didn't talk to you for a while. I was too embarrassed. I'd just kept saying it over and over and you kept laughing at me, it was a nightmare." He smiled at me playfully.
"I thought you were grounded." I whispered. I could count on both hands how many times someone had told me they loved me in my life, but Jake had said it dozens of times that night and they had apparently all been mine without me even knowing.
I grabbed his face and kissed him. I might not be ready to say it back yet, but I was definitely ready to feel him against me.
