Absolute Zero (A Stiles Stilinski/Teen Wolf Fanfiction) [4]

Chapter 18 - Pulses

WARNING: This chapter contains certain adult content. If that is in any way a problem for you please feel free to message me and we can work something out :)

I was sitting on the edge of my bed next to Eric, trying to wrap my brain around everything that happened last night. It still doesn't seem real. My mother, the sweet and caring woman who raised me is the Benefactor. She's the one trying to have me and all my friends killed. My own mother.

I had the perfect family. I had two parents who loved each other and their children, a big brother that would punch out anyone who made me cry, and a little sister that looked up to me. I had the perfect family.

"Do you think Mom and Dad were happy? Or were they just really good at pretending not to despise each other?" I asked, my voice soft and raspy.

Eric gave a huff before answering. "I don't think I ever saw them argue,"

I scoffed. "Maybe Mom was just one manipulative bitch."

Everything I've ever known feels like a lie. All of the happy memories I have with her are tarnished. All of those times I saw her, it was all just in my head. It was never really her. The women I thought I knew really did die in that car accident that night. I just wish I could still think of her that way.

"I can't believe she's alive," said Eric.

"I can't believe she put all of our names on a hit list," I shook my head, rubbing my hands over my face. "I feel so...violated. I mean what the - what the hell?"

It's like I don't even know who I am anymore. A few weeks ago I believed I was the daughter of two good people, two loving and caring people. Now I know the truth; I am the daughter of a pair of ruthless murderers. Killing and savagery is in my blood. I don't want to be that person, but I'm afraid I've already become her. I've already taken a life. I've already hurt the ones I love.

"I mourned for her. I - I cried for her!" I said, an anger rushing through my veins. "I carried the guilt of her death on my shoulders every single day, for this? For her to have just been plotting our demise this entire time?"

I wrapped my fist around the cross pendant of my necklace. This was all a lie too. The very idea I've lived my life by the past year meant nothing. I squeezed my hand around it, giving it a sharp tug and pulling it off my neck. I looked at it for a moment, a sliver of my reflection in the fake diamond sets, before tossing it aside.

"She fooled all of us," said Eric. 

I looked over at him, a steadiness in his eyes. He's grown up so much since returning home. I wish I could handle things with as much levelheadedness as he can. Then again, he wasn't the one who looked our supposedly dead mother in the eye as she held a knife to his throat.

"She may still be alive," I started. "But she is dead to me."

"They have her in custody, Em," said Eric, placing a soft hand on my shoulder. "We'll get our answers, and then she will be put away for a very long time,"

I stood up from the bed, marching over to my vanity. I leaned over the wood, glaring down at the cross necklace on the floor. Not having it around my neck felt strange, but it also felt like a weight lifted from my shoulders. 

I don't know how I'm supposed to react to something like this. I don't know if I should cry or scream or run down to the station and kill her myself. All I know is I'm scared and confused and nothing seems to make sense. It's as though my entire world has gone fuzzy. I need something to pull me back down.

I hung my head, my chest heaving over my ragged breaths. I squinted my eyes at something on the floor, poking out just underneath the vanity. I squatted down, pulling at the patterned piece of clothing. My heart sunk when I examined it, realizing it was one of Stiles' flannels. My legs went weak as I held onto it, backing themselves into the bed so I could sit back down. I held the shirt out in front of me, staring blankly at it as my mind ran rapid.