Aesthetic

Chapter 1

Maybe it's the fact that when I was born, I came out of my mom with a perfectly straight face. Or maybe it was the fact that whatever happened, I could always look indifferent. It might even be the fact that I am good at nothing.
But there has to be some explanation as to why I am completely average. Black hair, brown eyes, not too tall, not too skinny. I'm... just moderate.
And maybe that's why my outlook on life has been completely normal. I don't care if I become famous or infamous. I just want to be normal.
So when my acceptance letter from NYU arrived, I just did not care. My mom cooked up a storm of my favorite foods, and my dad gave me a congratulatory slap on the back a little too hard. But me? All I did was give a weak smile and throw my hands up in mock celebration.
     After being force-fed no less than 30 pounds of the world famous Pierce household lasagna, I headed upstairs to my room. Slamming the door shut, I pulled open the window and climb outside.
     Despite the chill, I still find it the best place to be. I lay down and wrap my hands around me.
There's the Big Dipper, I think, starting out small. Then I move onto others, like Orion. Finally, I just stop doing anything and just lay there, watching my breath as it appears in little clouds.
     It's so peaceful. Like a mute button's been pressed on everything. It's only me and the stars. Even though I know nothing will happen, I still send out a mental message to one of them. Maybe someone on the other side of the world is looking at that star too.
Hey, I say, I know you're never going to hear this, but things are okay down here. How's it like for you? Are you going to college? Maybe I'll meet you there.
     And my words are spoken into an empty night. I know it's useless, but it still keeps me grounded. And I don't want to be floated into the empty space again. Once, but never again.
     I let this thought linger for a second, unspoken words on my silent lips. Then, someone has pressed the play button around me, and I hear movement and sound. I get up slowly, climb back inside my room, close the window, and give one last glance to the stars.