This is a sequel. Please read part 1 first.
Thank you and enjoy ❤️
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Megan.
The fresh, warm air caught me by surprise once I walked out of the double doors of Temple University Hospital. They tried to roll me out in a wheel chair, and I had a fit. I was not going to begin this new place in my life feeling helpless like I did for the week I spent in that hospital with those annoying sounds and annoying nurses and their fake ass happiness. I sighed deeply out of relief and let a smile spread across my face. Freedom.
It seemed like winter had left and spring had arrived while I was stuck in there feeling sorry for myself. I was more than happy to be out and in a new head space. Like the weather, I too needed this fresh start.
I looked out the window of Trey's impala like a tourist as we silently drove down the streets of Philadelphia to get to his apartment. I didn't know what to say to him, and I think he felt the same way. Was he still upset with me for choosing Alonzo over him? Did he still love me like he told me those few times? Why did he stay with me in the hospital? Was it because he felt sorry for me? My mind was going about a thousand miles a minute, but I quickly tried to shake those thoughts. "Fresh start, Meg." I said to myself in my head. It didn't take long to get to his place, but the way my mind wandered, it seemed like it took forever.
Trey unlocked the door and I hesitantly followed him in. Immediately, coziness wrapped around me like a blanket as I took in the familiar scent and smiled to myself. It's good to be home.
"I left your bags in the car." I heard him say, taking me out of my trance, as he plopped down on the couch. "I'll get them later."
I took a moment to stare at him from afar. His long legs were spread apart as he sat slouched on the sofa, with his head thrown back and his forearm covering his eyes. I knew he was tired. He had been with me every day since I had been in the hospital. I know he hadn't slept in his bed since that night. He went straight from class, to work, and right back to my hospital room. I smiled thinking about how good he had been to me, then my mind traveled to darker places. How maybe this whole situation could have been avoided had I made a smarter decision.
I sat next to him on the couch and hesitantly stretched my legs out across his lap waiting for his reaction. He didn't have one. "Trey."
"hmm?" he answered with his head still rested against the back of the couch and his eyes closed.
"I haven't had sex with Alonzo since December." Were the only words I could find to begin this conversation.
"So what?" He growled with irritation. "I don't want to heart about that shit. Don't even say his name."
"You're not listening." I said before pausing. My heart was speeding and I could swear I was sweating. "I haven't had sex with him since December. The last time I had sex, it was with you."
There was a moment of silence that felt like hours. His face was still covered, so I couldn't read him. But when he sat up and looked at me, I could tell he got it.
"So what are you saying?" he brought himself to ask.
"That night...The night I said I love you...Remember...we didn't use a condom." I said, nervously breaking up my sentence as I played with my now clammy hands in my lap. I didn't want to look at him.
"Yeah, I remember what happened Megan, but what are you saying?" Trey asked again hoping that it wouldn't be what he was thinking.
Megan didn't speak. She just stared at him apologetically. She could see his eyes become slightly glossy and didn't know what else to do.
"It was my baby?" he asked.
Tremaine
I watched Megan sit up and wrap her arms around my neck while her tears traveled down her cheeks. She was moving in slow motion; it felt that way to me anyway. "I'm sorry." She cried into my neck. "I'm so sorry." She kept saying it, but it didn't change the fact that my mind was running a mile a minute. I felt dizzy, like I was going to pass out from shock due to the sudden news I had just received.
I couldn't help myself anymore. I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding and let my tears slide down my cheeks and onto Megan's neck.
"I'm sorry." She kept repeating hugging me tighter. "It's okay though. I was only five weeks."
"Okay? It's not okay." I said. "Why do I keep losing my fucking babies?" I thought I said to myself, but I felt the words vibrate off of her neck.
My sadness subsided and turned to anger quickly and I lifted Meg off my lap. I could feel my face flush and my body heat up. I wiped my face rougly, took a deep breath and got up off of the couch. After pacing back and forth in a small square, not knowing what to do with my life, I walked into the bathroom and threw some water on my face before heading to the front door.
"Where are you going?" She asked me with concern in her voice, but I didn't respond. I didn't know what to say, nor did I want to say anything. I heard her feet quicken as she made her way up to me before my hand reached the knob. "Tremaine!" she yelled grabbing my arm as I was trying to pull away.
"I just need some air." I told her. What I really needed was a blunt, and for her to get out of my face.
I wasn't necessarily upset with her, but then again I was. She didn't even have to be in a situation to let that nigga hurt her, and worst of all, my child. How could I feel sorry for her when she repeatedly put herself in that situation? When I told her over and over that I would love and protect her. I needed to get away before I snapped on her and said something I knew I would regret. Especially when she wasn't emotionally fit for the shit I had built up.
"No Trey!" She yelled slightly. "I need you here with me. It was my baby too, remember?" she asked beginning to cry. "Or I'll go with you."
It was quiet for a minute before I looked down at her.
"Megan." I said sternly. "You should probably just let me go."
She stared up at me. Her mouth was slightly ajar, as if she were trying to figure out whether she should speak or not. Her almond shaped eyes widened and were dressed with hurt and I felt a little bad.
"Just for a little while. I'll be back. Just go take a bath and lay down and I'll be back by the time you wake up." I assured in an attempt to hide my anger toward her.
"You blame me." She stated in a whisper as if she were reading me and confirming. "You blame me for this. You blame me for the loss of our baby."
I couldn't find any words, so I just stared at her sad eyes. She backed away and made her way to the bathroom and shut the door.
I stood in the same spot, staring at what would've been Megan if she hadn't moved. I was stuck, unsure of what to do. Was I supposed to go after her? Should I have lied? Should I just go, and come back when my emotions are under control? Shit was back to being difficult already.
"Day fucking one." I huffed before walking out of the door.
