The Lord of Misrule

Chapter 12

"Parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus" - Mountains will be in labour, and an absurd mouse will be born (All that work and nothing to show for it)

Mikael and Ami had decided to walk towards the city to find some breakfast. Missing dinner last night had started a mini rebellion in their bellies, and the warehouse district only had chicken-feed on offer. The morning air carried with it a slight chill as the sun emerged from behind the town walls. Slowly, the city stirred to life. 

"Let's duck in there and see what we're dealing with." Mikael nodded towards an alleyway behind a small eatery that apparently also served as the neighborhood's waste heap. The restaurant's back-door was propped open by an old boiling pot, presumably because the stench of rot was stronger inside the restaurant than outside. A couple of stray cats that patrolled the pile skirted off into the shadows when they saw Mikael and Ami.

"Here, hold this." Mikael handed the strongbox to Ami and scanned the dump for anything useful. Ami turned the box over in her hands and sighed in frustration.

"These are iron bolts – there's no way we can force it open. That useless tub of lard was clearly not taking any chances."

Mikael fished out a couple of bent butter knives from the pile and began twisting their pointed end into the opening of the locks. He gripped the knives in a peculiar fashion -- holding them in a reverse grip, his fists held up in front of him like a boxer. He had placed the strongbox on a ledge at waist height.

Crouching, so his eyes were level with the box, he held one of the knives very still inside the lock and gently twisted the pointed end of the other one with his right hand. Soon enough, they heard a faint 'click', the iron bolt snapping open with a metallic clang. He gave the other bolt the same treatment.

Ami whistled and gave Mikael an appreciative look. "That was pretty impressive...for a wannabe constable."

She grinned at his mock laugh. The only object inside the strongbox was an envelope, pressed together with a wax seal that wasn't immediately recognizable. The seal had an image of a serpent wrapped around the globe, and both Ami and Mikael exchanged twin looks of intrigue.

Ami broke the seal and slipped out the insert, the anticipation making her fingers tingle. As she began reading, the anticipation morphed into confusion, and then into thinly-veiled dismay.

The note was an incomprehensible jumble of letters and numbers.

"Are you f--ing with me? This is what I risked life and limb for?" Her eyes flickered up to Mikael's in exasperation. "Why in pig's bullocks was that fat pilchard guarding it like his life depended on it? Argh, for f--k's sake! This is the absolute worst luck!"

She shot Mikael, who was trying his hardest not to burst out in laughter, a venomous glare. His shoulders convulsed and he had to keep his hand clamped firmly over his mouth.

"This is all your fault, you lard-brained lout!" she yelled at him. She sucked her teeth and flicked the envelope towards the pile of waste.

Mikael grabbed the envelope before it landed and scanned the letter. Ami eyed him warily, hands on her hips. She was prepared to hurl another torrent of insults at him if he so much as smiled improperly.

"Well, not all is lost," he said, peering thoughtfully at the code. "Hmm, let's grab breakfast and ruminate, shall we? Or, if you would rather find something else to steal, please make sure you know what it is first," he said with a smug grin.

She pointed threateningly at the butter knives he had used to pick the locking bolts. "Hell's teeth -- I will use these to chisel your nadgers off!" .