Even in Death (#Wattys2015)

The Past Stays in the Past

My cell phone vibrated furiously in the seat beside me. Twelve voicemails and thirty five text messages later, I reached the lake where Carson and I spent our last night together. I quickly sent a group message to Hunter and Bailey: I'm fine, I need my space. You've both betrayed me, I'll come home when I come home.

As I hit send, I threw my phone onto the dashboard and slowly made my way down to the water. I felt a rush of cool air swirl around me and smiled as I sat down at the waters edge.

"Hi, Carson."

I looked to my left and there she was, smiling and scowling at me at the same time.

How could you.....do that.....to me, Willow? Her broken whisper flowed through my head.

"I don't know. I don't know anything anymore. I didn't want you to die, Carson! You left me, not the other way around! And....and I can't just sit around and be miserable....and.....I like her!"

I was sobbing uncontrollably at this point and the tide was bringing the water to the tips of my toes and splashing them lightly.

"You like me still, do ya darlin'?"

I spun around to see Bailey a few feet away from me, and Hunter sitting in her truck, fuming. I ignored her question and looked back to the left to see Carson still next to me. She grabbed my hand and squeezed gently for support.

Bailey walked and sat right where Carson was...technically. "Hear me out, please Willow?"

I shook my head, stood up, and began pacing back and forth in a small quadrant. "I don't want to hear what either of you have to say. You lied to me."

Bailey sighed and pushed her long hair out of her face. I could tell she cared and I could tell she wanted to fix things but I didn't think I could just forgive either of them.

"I was moving on. I thought you wanted me. Broken, fucked up, I thought you cared. But it was all a favor from my brother. A favor. How do you think that makes me feel?! I've got the ghost of my dead fiancé haunting me and my brother and a girl that I have feelings for LYING TO ME!!!"

The tears were pouring down my face, drenching the collar of my shirt. I heard a gasp and looked up to see that Hunter had made his way down to us and overheard what I said.

"What the fuck do you mean, Willow?"

I scoffed. "None of your business."

"It is my business. You are supposed to tell us if you see things or if you feel bad about Carson. Why didn't you tell me?" His voice had softened and he pulled me into his arms.

I felt another pair of arms wrap around me from behind and knew it was Bailey instantly. "I didn't want anyone to think that I was crazy. She's here now. She won't leave me alone. I can't get her out of my head, literally."

I felt Bailey tighten her grip around me. "Nobody thinks your crazy, darlin'. Mind if I tell you a story?"

I struggled out of their grip and nodded my head slowly, wiping the tears from my eyes. I led them to the waters edge and sat down so my feet were submerged. Hunter and Bailey took post on either side of me, both of them placing a hand on my thigh.

"Watch it, B. She's still my little sister." Hunter growled and I giggled.

"You know, Hunter, I'm not as innocent as you might think." I winked at Bailey, knowing we were both remembering our steamy date in her deer lease. She blushed and moved her hand to my knee.

I rolled my eyes and cleared my throat. "Oh, sorry, story time."

"When I was in middle school, I had a lot of stuff going on. My old man was deployed for 3 years, and that left my mom going kinda crazy dealing with me and my sister. I had just turned 21 and my sister was about to celebrate her 17th birthday. Two weeks before we threw her big party, my dad was medically discharged after he lost a leg to a suicide bomber."