I'll Follow You (GirlxGirl)

1. Now, who is the one that is lost?

I am lying in the middle of the bed, my legs and arms spread out. Staring at the white roof. Every Thursday is like this, Monday as well. Those are the worst days in the week. Those two days have been like that for almost four years now, and I go to work Tuesday and Friday half-dead, because of the lack of sleep. If she does not change her work time soon I am going to glue her ass to this bed. Seriously, she knows I can't sleep without her and still she goes out and get a job where she works late at night. I wouldn't have asked her to marry me, if I knew this was going to happen. No, who I am kidding?

I start to play with the ring my wife gave me for about eight years ago. Reach you. It stands. Then where the hell are you? My eyes are dying of sleep. No matter how many years it has gone, I still have nightmares when she is not in the bed with me at night. So, I have to lay awake until she comes home. If not I will wake up to the worst image in my head, and feeling my lungs struggling to reach for air.

We have already started a new year and it is only a week until I will turn twenty-six. Sky has been acting weird for over a month, and I have no idea what is going on. She comes late home from work and she looks stressed out. There is something she is keeping from me, but I don't know what it is. I am pretty sure she does not know that I know there is something wrong. She is easy to read, just like a book. I want to ask her, but I am too scared. She has been ill for a week now, very nauseous and threw up a few times. It might be the reason that she is so weird.

The sound of a door opening makes me rush out of bed and into the hallway. I see her some few meters in front of me and I feel my heart clam down. My body won't relax until I know she is home and safe here with me. I have that feeling every day. I guess I am scared of losing her. She smiles to me as she comes shuffling towards me with her blond hair and tired brown eyes.

"I'm dying, honey." Sky says yawing as she wrap her arms around me. I hold her tightly, I kind of have to because she is leaning all of her weight on me.

"Good, because I have been waiting for you." I tell her, smiling and start walking backwards to the bedroom with her. Some few months after I ended up at the hospital, I started to work out, because I couldn't handle walking around weak all the time. My muscles just wouldn't come back to the way they were, so now I am even stronger than I was. Sky did not complain when she noticed the changes. She and her dad said it was great that I got more weight on me. I know I was skinny before, but now I am how I should be.

I lay down in bed with Sky all over me. She looks so tired after a long day at work. I hate her job, just because of the late nights at the hospital. Sky started to work with her mother after college and it is going very fine. Except Monday and Thursday.

Rachel and Luke have been very helpful for us when we finished high school, but I feel guilty about it. Because they have done so much for me, helping me out of my hellhole, paying for college, and then bought a little house for Sky and me. I told her that I felt bad about it, but she told me that we are family and it is fine.

I jump awake from my thoughts as I feel a cold hand on my stomach, and I smile to the grinning blond women.

"Now, who is the one that is lost?" She asks teasing and yawn. I brush her long hair away from her face and just start to stroke her. It makes her close her eyes.

"Just thinking." I smile and kiss the top of her head. Sky takes a deep breath.

"I'm going to sleep." She whispers lightly and it makes me snort.

"Okay, honey." I tell her, looking at the roof and brushing her softly in the hair. I remember how it was before I was used to her touching me. She tried so hard and I just kept on pushing her away from me. I felt bad about it, but just couldn't turn it around. It was hard to trust anyone, even Sky's father. Took weeks before I could manage to look him in the eyes, it made me so uncomfortable. I still do not like when someone is looking at me, my heart beats too fast, my eyes wander around looking at something else, and I can't keep my hands steady. Well, if I could put it in other words: I do not like people, because they hurt. That is one of the reasons I used to long time to trusting Skylar, but now I do.

I grew up in a house with the people I should have trusted with my whole heart, but they failed me. Now I have a new family, but still I have some contact with Sara. I see her maybe once a month, I hate it, but to be honest, it looks like she has changed. Took me almost three years before I could have a real conversation with her. She told me all of her wrongs and those things she should have done from the beginning. Sara regret everything and she wanted to start all over again. I do not trust her like I do with Sky's family, but I am trying, because Sky thinks it is important to let it all behind. She is right, I know that, because she is always right.

I smile as I look down at my sleeping wife. Poor thing, working late even though she is still ill. Sky does not want to stay home, telling me that she is fine, but she is so damn grumpy when she is sick and it do not just affect her. It makes me irritated as well sometimes, but I am good at hiding it. Compared to, Skylar. She just burst out right away, it's funny sometimes and she hates when I laugh of her. Her cheeks so red and her eyes so dark. It makes her look gorgeous. Everything about her is beautiful. Her blond silky hair, brown, dark eyes, and most of all her straight out personality. Sky, do not hold anything back, she just opens her mouth without thinking and it is very funny.

"Goddammit, Skylar, I love you."