His Hidden Side [HIATUS]

Chapter 11

Sound of something falls from the kitchen shocks you. You jumped from the bed while mumbling goodbye to your members. You quickly make your way toward the kitchen while holding a bat. Who knows if it is a thief?

Kyungsoo. Why he is here? And what he is doing? Suho already told you they'll be late, so why does this man is standing infront of you now with pieces of broken glass all around the floor? Physocopath?

He is staring at you unblinkingly. It is a cold stare. It is not him. It doesn't feel like him. He bends to take the pieces of the mug that he carelessly dropped. You want to help him but something inside you stopped yourself to do so. The image of his stare before still remains in your mind and you're undeniable afraid of him now.

The male throws the broken pieces into a small dustbin in the corner of the kitchen and washes his hands after that. You're still watching his every steps, aware to make a move that may mislead to something else.

Eventually, you decided to step outside the kitchen. Why are you here though? You don't even know what to do. Useless.

"Hold on" He murmur after you took a few steps. You turned your body to face him, but only his backs that greet you. He is not looking at you. His front body is still facing the sink. Again, you feel unwanted, but you hold yourself together to hear what he wants to tell.

'Just bear with it. I know you can do it. Just let him say what he wants and then, boom. We will outta of here soon', you told yourself.

Kyungsoo moves himself to grab a new mug and open the refrigerator to take a jug of water. Then, swiftly pours it in. He is thinking. Arranging a correct sentence for you in his mind. Words that can't hurt you.

After a while, he spoke, "Do you believe in love?". That shocking question slightly makes you nervous, but for your own sake, you tried to look confident. But he knows. He knows everything.

 "I.. I do believe in it.." You want to give a proper answer but what come out is a stutter.

"I can see that you're loving baekhyun, as well as him. But every love has it own price. I'm afraid in the end both of you'll be heartbroken and you'll be left dumbfounded. It's something that I hope the least.

So, how about you stop this nonsense now? Snapping your mind into reality now? Baekhyun is unreachable for you to grab. He might seems near, but actually he is far away from you. So, what do you think?"

His words somewhat make you rage inside. His words has the truth but who the hell is he to command you to leave? And as if you're willing to obey his words.

"So what if I love him? Is that a sort of problem to you? Or do you, in somehow, loving me too?" You spit, wanting him to know his place because he won't love you anyway.

But little did you know that he actually had developed feelings toward you? Quietly. Sincerely.

"Love? I don't have any courage about it anymore. I lost it a long time ago. Since my heart broke, I don't have any guts to love anymore." He lies, sipping his water calmly. His cold back is dissapointing you. He didn't even turn around to look at you. He is facing the refrigerator rather than your face and it hurts your feelings a lil bit.

"So, then, you have to know that I also don't have the courage to send him away. I can't live without him. He changes me. He break my walls that I preciously built all of this time, how can you expect me to leave?" You asks back, challenging him.

"You don't have to leave for god's sake. If you feel you're doing a right thing, then just continue it. But your future is the fucking things that matter now. What if his fans know about this? What if they hurt you? Your new career will found its dead earlier than what you expect. Do you want it to happen!?" He raged, raising his hands up in the air out of frustation.

 His sentence touches your heart. He is concern? The thoughts that he will ruin your relationship with baekhyun flew away immediately. Kyungsoo is worried of you , thats all and you're really grateful about that.

You step forward, having the courage to backhug him. You rest your right cheek on his shoulder and muttered, "Thank you for your concern, oppa. You're really a good guy indeed. My future is something that I'll decide for. Baekhyun and I will make sure we won't hurt each other. And.. the prices that you told me, I'll make sure it is worth for. I will take your words as an advice from a concern brother".

"Baekhyun is not like what you thought. He may seems amusing and cheerful, but you wouldn't know whats going on in his head.", he advised.

You hummed before unhooking your hands which are wrapping him all of this time. You give his right arm a tap before going to baekhyun's room once again. The feelings is good, to have someone concerns about you.

Concern brother? Yup, that is Kyungsoo to you. A brother.

Kyungsoo turned himself as you are walking away from him. Your unreachable backs somehow comforts him. He is such a fool. He is sorry that he can't say how much he loves you. He maybe have a chance if he did so just now but it is already ruin. No matter how much he tries, you're still too far from him.

"Loving someone is really hard. It hurts too much here. I hope there'll be someday where people that I love, will love me back." Kyungsoo said while rubbing his chest. He is comforting himself like what he'd do before. He get used to it. In love with someone who doesn't notice his presence is his undeniable fate.

"Because I'm a dumbass, I only can see you from distance. I don't hate Baekhyun. He makes you smile like an angel with him. He makes you laugh beautifully. He makes you happy honestly. How could I hate him?" His voice is cracking and one tear falls on his cheek. Two. Three. He is crying.

 After a long time, finally, he sheds tears and the reason is you. You changes the cold Kyungsoo. He is weak now. And he can't deny that. Forcefully, he wipes his tears with the back of his hand.

"You shouldn't hug me. It feels wrong yet so good", Kyungsoo smiled.

Slowly, he said "Goodbye. You'll always be that dream that I can't reach for. Too precious, and too fragile for me." The door that you slummed answers for him. The quiet goodbye that he murmured, doesn't he know partings never so easy?

~

☆Guys, did you notice my style writting had already changed? So do you like the different? I hope so ;-; Cause I enjoy writing this more now ♡♡ It feels so good ♡ And I don't promise you that I'll update fast now as school is starting soon ;-; But I'll make sure, an update a week is a must ! Thank you for reading this 

 Btw, I read this while hearing Taeyeon-If and I got too emotional, lol ;-; I'm crying rn ;-;☆