"Hey, Kalani? Nari wants to see you." You look up from your computer. Nari's assistant Park Chanyeol stands in front of you with a nervous wide-eyed smile. He chews on his lip—the tell-tale sign that this conversation is not going to be a good one. You sigh and stand, saving your work and switching off your monitor.
You follow his lanky figure down the hall and into the elevator. The short ride is awkward. He fiddles with his sleeve, refusing to be still while you radiate pure fatigue. He must interpret it as bristling anger because he shies away from you, shrinking his giant form into the corner of the lift. But you really are just tired. More tired than you've ever been in your life.
It feels like there is so much you want to talk about, even though you can't find the words to talk about any of it. All the same, even if you could find the words, the only people you want to talk to are the two that you burned your bridges with.
Finally the elevator dings, and Chanyeol visibly melts with relief. He leads you to Nari's office and knocks twice before opening the door. He nods briefly at you, giving you a small, tight-lipped smile, and then excuses himself and closes the door.
And then you are trapped.
Nari doesn't look up from the papers spread in front of her, but your presence doesn't escape her.
"Well, are you going to sit?" You make your way to one of the chairs in front of her desk.
"You wanted to see me, Ms. Hyeon?"
"No. Obviously Mr. Park just brought you up here for his own pleasure."
You are not in the mood for this today. Seated in front of your boss or not, you are a few seconds from getting up and walking out the door. But then Nari meets your eyes with a small smirk playing at the corner of her mouth. She looks back down at the papers and makes a note of something before putting the pen down and folding her arms.
"All right, Kalani. What's wrong with you?" You brace yourself for the beating you are about to take. "You haven't met a deadline on your touch-ups all week. You look like Hell frozen over. The old lady bags under your eyes make me wonder if you've even slept an hour in the past few days. I'm an insomniac, and I've never looked that bad in my life."
Gee thanks.
"Anyway, point is, something's wrong. And I want to get to the bottom of it. If there's a problem, much better to fix it than let it fester."
You're ready to go through the motions. Even to you, the words feel empty. "I'm really sorry about the deadlines, Ms. Hyeon. I know my work has been unacceptable lately. I'll work really hard to turn it around and—"
"If you say 'do better,' I will fire you right here and now." Her eyes read complete sincerity. "Kalani, I don't want to hear that. Your work suffering is the symptom of a much more serious disease. Now if we're done with the pleasantries, I want the truth. What's going on with you?"
You're not about to unload your inability to form lasting relationships on your boss.
"Nothing, ma'am. I've just been distracted is all."
"Do you think I'm an idiot? That must be what it is. Because you're insisting on insulting my intelligence right now." She sighs and runs her hands through her hair. "Listen, Kalani. You're a young photographer with a lot of promise. And a lot of heart, too. I'm a smart woman. So when I see a bright up-and-comer suddenly not living up to her potential, I know something's wrong. There's something else," she continues. "I've got a lot of heart, too. You don't get to this position without it."
She leans forward, a strange sympathy in her eyes that you've never seen there before. For the first time, you realize just how young Nari is. Strangely enough, she's still your peer. A very, very successful peer, but a peer nonetheless. She's maybe...35? Sure, she's older than you, but she's extraordinarily young for someone running their own pro studio and attracting clientele like Chen...
Her words are a soft song when she speaks again. "But I know that with a lot of heart, comes a lot of real estate to be broken." You've never heard Nari's voice so gentle. "So why don't you go ahead and tell me who broke yours?"
Then it hits you. Nari isn't trying to be your boss right now; she's trying to be your friend. And you are so grateful that somebody still cares that you do tell her. You tell her that a week ago, you watched a man that should have been your fiancé walk out your door. You tell her that you still haven't had the strength to call the man you picked over him. You admit how scared you are that you are just in love with the possibility of Jongdae. You admit how scared you are that he will want nothing to do with you and that you will be truly alone with no one to blame but yourself. You explain how long you loved Jongdae and how deep you loved Minseok. You try to explain that you can't sleep because you can't breathe because the apartment feels too cold for you to catch your breath.
And at the end of it all, Nari walks around her desk and hugs you.
For the first time in what seems like a lifetime, someone holds you while you cry.
"I don't know Minseok," she whispers. "I'm sure he's a wonderful man if he's worth your tears. But I do know Jongdae. Not as well as you, but I know him. And if after your fight he only loves you half as much as what I saw when he looked at you here, then you don't have a thing to worry about."
"You...you saw?" You are more than slightly embarrassed that your boss noticed your love affair with one of her most sought after clients.
She laughs lightly. "Honey, everybody in the studio saw. His manager pulled me aside one day and said he had never seen Jongdae's eyes light up as bright as they did when he was around you. Not even when he performed—and anyone who's watched Chen perform knows that he has a grand old time when he's onstage. When your work started slipping, I figured he had made some promises he didn't keep and that's why you were so upset. But I had no idea it ran this deep." She falls silent for a moment, handing you a tissue to wipe your eyes.
"Kalani...I think you should go find him. I don't know anything about matters of destiny or fate, and I don't know if you do either. I've never been much of a romantic. The idea of anything being laid in place from the time we're born sounds so...far-fetched to me. But I don't think I've ever heard a more far-fetched true story than what you just told me." The two of you laugh a little at that. It was a wild tale, to say the least. "So maybe that should tell you something. Make of that what you'd like." Nari stands and crosses back to the chair behind her desk.
"All right. Head on home," she says, returning to the signing of her papers.
"What?" You sniff. "Home?"
"You're in no shape to work. You're going to read the delete button as the save key through your tears and shred your whole portfolio." You laugh again. Nari was really good at this comforting thing. "Just do me a favor and clean yourself up before you leave. People are going to think I fired you or something."
"Nari—" you start.
"Ah. Ms. Hyeon," she corrects without looking up.
Whoops. Missed the shift back to business as usual.
"Thank you."
A small smile crosses her face as she initials another contract.
YOU ARE READING
Boundaries
FanfictionReunions should be beautiful times, moments filled with joy, awe, and wonder...shouldn't they? When you are heading down the career path you have dreamed of for years, when the world's sweetest man is by your side, when you are being offered the opp...