Topic: when he sees your scars
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Gilinsky (age 12)
You're in the bathroom, staring at yourself in the mirror. There's blood running down your wrist. You have a small razor blade in your hand. You're crying, silently. You quickly turn on the water and put your bloody wrist that are full of freshly new cuts.
It stings when the water touches the cuts and you hiss in pain. You turn of the water, grabbing a towel to dry the cuts. You've made 2 new cuts. This has been going on for almost a month.
No one knows, and that's how you want it. After they're completely dry you put 2 band aids and cover them with your bracelets. Your brother jack always asks why you wear so many bracelets and you respond with I just really like bracelets. They're like good luck!
But that's not what you actually think. That's just a cover up. Afterwards, you leave your bathroom and walk back into your room. Good thing I have my own bathroom, you thought. You get on your bed and stare up at the ceiling.
Your brother jack, is in his room doing god knows what. It's raining outside and that almost makes you feel a bit better. You like the sound of rain hitting the roof, it's relaxing. You just forget about everything.
It's 6:30 pm. Almost time for dinner. You're so hungry, because you haven't eaten anything all day. Not cause you didn't want to but because you were 'busy'.
Some time later jack came into your room. "Hey babe, it's time to eat." He said smiling at you. Why can't I be happy? you thought. You faked a smile and replied with, "I'll be down in a minute."
"Ok, but hurry. Wouldn't wanna miss dinner with the princess." He said and left closing the door. After a minute or so you stop looking at the ceiling because that's what you were doing the whole time.
You got off your bed and walked downstairs towards the kitchen. You walked in to see jack sitting on the counter and your mom by the stove. "I thought dinner was ready." You said. "Almost pumpkin." Your mom said.
"Lier!" You said to jack. "You were in your room the whole day. So I thought I should make you come downstairs by tricking you." He explained.
"Jack 1/Bae 0." He added. You shaked your head and went into the living room. You sat on the couch and turned on the tv putting on Disney channel. Jack sat next to you and looked at what you were watching.
He smirked at you and you sat there confused. "What?" You asked. "Nothing." He said, his smirk turning into a smile.
"Shouldn't you be hanging with the other jack?" You asked. "Oh, you mean Johnson? He's on a trip with his family." He responded.
"Kids, dinner is ready!" Your mom yelled out. You looked at jack, who also looked at you. "Look it's Gabriella from high school musical." You lied and pointed towards the tv screen.
"Where?" Jack said inspecting the screen intently. While he did that you went to the bathroom to wash your hands quickly. You ran to the dining room where your mom was setting up the plates.
You sat on one of the chairs and waited for the food. Today was spaghetti night. Your favorite. (A\N; I actually hate spaghetti, sorry not sorry.) After your mom served you, you started eating your spaghetti which was delicious. A few moments later as you were eating, you heard footsteps coming closer.
Soon jack sat next to you glaring at you. "What?" You said. "You made me miss 5 minutes of dinner!" He said.
"What are you gonna do about it?" You asked as you finished. You got up and put your plate in the sink. You went out the kitchen and up to your room. You got on your bed and took off your bracelets revealing your recent scars.
You lightly touched them, flinching as it was still drying up a bit. "Good thing jack didn't see them." You said. "See what?" Jack said. You jumped and fell off your bed.
"Woah, are you okay?" He asked running over to you. "Yeah I am." You said trying to hide your arm behind you. "What are you hiding?" He asked raising an eyebrow. "Why would I be hiding something?" You asked trying to sound clueless.
"Don't play dumb with me. You're acting strange and that's not like you." He said. You sighed not looking at him. He grabbed you by the wrists helping you up which made you squeal. "Did I hurt you?" He said as you both sat on your bed.
"No." You croaked out. He looked to see your bracelets on the center of the bed. He picked them up and looked at them. He made a confused face then worried.
"Why is there blood on your bracelets?" He asked slowly. "I don't know." You shrugged. He put them down. "Let me see your wrists." He said. "Why, there's nothing wrong with them." You defended lying.
"Then let me see them." He said. "No." You said. He got on his knees in front of you. He had watery eyes which made your eyes water. A tear rolled down his cheek which made you cry.
You pulled out your wrist — the right one — where you had made the scars. You turned them so jack could see. His mouth dropped open and he put his fingers over them.
It didn't hurt when he touched them because he wasn't pressing hard on them. "Why'd you do it?" He blurted out not looking at you. "Because I'm not happy. I wish I was, but I'm not." You admitted.
"Why aren't you happy?" He asked again not looking at you. "Because no one likes or loves me!" You yelled out. "Why would you say that? Mom and dad love you. I LOVE YOU!" He yelled the last part.
He was looking at you, and his jaw was clenched. "Oh yeah? Then why'd you leave when you knew what was going on at the time?" You said sobbing by now.
"It was last minute! I didn't have a choice!" He yelled letting out tears. "YES YOU DID! It was touring for 6 months or stay home!" You yelled back. "What was I supposed to do?! Turn down the opportunity?!" He yelled.
"I'm pretty sure you weren't even thinking about turning it down! You didn't even say bye!" You pushed him away and turned around facing your window. You hid your face in your hands silently sobbing.
You were surprised your mom didn't hear the yelling that was going on. You felt someone sit next to you and out their arm around you. "I'm sorry. I know I didn't say bye, but you didn't have to cut your wrists." He said.
You sighed and took your hands off your face. You looked down at the scars. "I guess I just wasn't thinking." You muttered.
"Please don't do it again. I'll be the best brother possible. I'm sorry." He said fully hugging you now. "It's okay." You said "I won't." You added. "I love you." He said. "I love you too." You said.
—
I'm not dead, I haven't updated in like forever! School had started back after winter break and I was just settling into school again. Next Bsm is Aaron.
- ash♡
1/29/16 ; 7:25 pm
