Crossroads: Path Between Love and Lust

Chapter 3: Double Karma

The love I had once for Lust was so indescribable that no matter how much hate I had towards, I decided that anytime she needed me I was going to be there for her. I had no choice, she had my heart.....

At this point in time, my little brother, TJ, and I were going through the same type of relationship. Everything between me and my relationship with Lust was happening between his relationship with Lo. Now TJ, he was a little ahead of me in recovering from a years spent relationship. He gave me pointers on everything I needed to know. He wasn't over Lo but he was in charge of her heart instead of she being in charge of his heart. He told me "Get what you can while you can", and that reference stuck. Lust decided to talk to this dude name Boom. I only found out because TJ was clowning one day and said, "Damn son, Lust done got her a new dude and you up here all depressed and shit. I swear that dude look just like you, but bigger."
I said, "how?"
He replied, "dude got longer dreads and he obviously taller than you cause your ass short."
I laughed.
TJ really was being messy because he went on to say how they be on Snapchat eight o'clock in the morning, how he always on Lust snaps, and they stay partying. I really didn't feel like hearing it so I kicked him out my house.

Feeling some type of way I message Lust from a text free app asking if she got a new dude. She told me they were just best friends and didn't look at each other in that way. By texting her, I'm guessing she wanted to know how I have been and unblocked me from everything she once had me blocked on. She started texting me more and finally decided to spend time with me after that incident we had when we were face to face. She described the reason wanting to go watch a movie felt so skeptical. I asked why she just don't go out and watch the movie with her "best friend", she responded that him and his friends were to childish. In my mind I'm like how in the hell can you be too childish just to watch a movie. The reason she gave just lead to me to think that all she wanted was to spend time with me. I accepted on her coming and when she came it felt like a decent "what friends do " type day. We never argued or anything. I used what TJ told me and stayed my distance. The "Get what you can while you can" motto slowly was evaporating though because of my interest in Wildfire. I knew Lust fell back in love with me because her jealous feelings came out when she noticed the whole time we were spending together I constantly was texting Wildfire letting her know how the day was going between us. She brushed it off I guess; but when she found out about this girl name Desi that came see me around Easter, her jealousness came back. I told her we didn't have sex only because of the fact that we were not together and my business wasn't her business anymore. Later, I went on to tell her we eventually did something.

Now Desi was a female that I been knew from grade school but I never went at her because I knew she use to talk to one of my homeboys. After I told him wassup and that I wanted her, he said go with my move. Lust knew Desi also because she was her close friend girlfriend awhile back. Somehow I mouthpieced Desi up to come drive where I stay, which was three hours away. She was spending the night so we planned to joke, drink and talk about "us." Desi wanted me bad but I didn't know if she wanted a relationship together because she was only sexually attracted to me. The feeling was mutual because her eyes glowed up in the light beach brown and her body. Let's just say that without clothes, was right in every place it needed to be. That night, we began drinking the moment she walk through the door. I was a light drinker so after 4-6 shots, I was done. She asked me to run her some bath water in the most sexiest voice ever as she eased her way on my lap. I look at the moment as if she was giving me this big tease. If she wanted me to come bath with her I didn't get the picture; because while she was in the tub, I was laid out on the cold floor thinking it was the sofa. I decided to take 3 more shots since she was taking long. Finally she came out the room to see me plopped on the floor with the music speaker to my ear like it was a cellphone. We both bust out laughing because neither one of us knew exactly what the hell I was doing. Desi wasn't even drunk and had only 3 shots from when she first stepped through the door. I told her catch up and she damn near drunk half the bottle. Listening to music, by now we both drunk and clowning about the littlest things. I'm still on the floor not knowing what's going on in the world right now and she just laughing up a storm. I eventually got up and glanced at what she had on. She was stretched out on the sofa with this polka dot, baby blue lingerie from Victoria Secret and had this big ass cotton robe that covered most parts of her body. My eyes instantly grew big, shocked at the fact she in front of me like this. She was basically throwing herself at me and I was getting ready to catch her like a raindrop.