Him (Ziall Horlik) AU

Chapter 17

Zayn's POV

I got back to Bradford around one in the afternoon and went straight to my parents house. I saw the garage was open and my sister's car was in the garage, but I didn't see my dad there. I slipped off the expensive cardigan and leather jacket that Niall I guess had bought me and got out of my car to go inside. I knew I was going to get shit from my parents about having expensive shit and stuff when they all know very well we don't have that much money. So I saved myself the question and answer by just taking off the expensive part of my outfit and went inside.

"Mum?" I yelled once I stepped through the door. I heard he say she was in the living room, so I walked there to see my mum working on her laptop with paperwork surrounding her. She gave me a smile and closed her laptop.

"Come here, baby boy. You doing alright?" She asked me. I went and sat next to her and let her cuddle me up as much as she wanted to. I spent the whole four hour drive from London blasting music and trying my hardest not to think about what I had just left behind. Now I was feeling the after effects and I really just needed my mum. It was like any other heart break, but this one came with a little more pain for some reason.

"I didn't know if I should bring it up later or now before your dad gets back from the shop, but I saw you on a magazine with that boy from One Direction. Care to explain that to me? You're father would be furious about it because he's always wanted us to be a private family and wouldn't like the fact that they questioned if you were the other boy's boyfriend, but I know we can talk. Just tell me a few things and I'll leave you to your own business." My mum told me then kissed my forehead. I moved so I was sitting to look at her in the face.

"Niall is just a friend, mum. We went out a few places and did some stupid stuff and I guess the magazines wanted to get up I'm our business. I hated that. Anytime we would go anywhere there were cameras. Even when I left the hotel I got mobbed by his fans and paparazzi. It's a crazy way to live and I don't think I'll be friends with him the way I'm friends with people that aren't famous." I told her, but all of my words were charged with an undertone that I could only hope she would understand what was actually going on. Unfortunately, she just gave me her clueless mother sad smile and told me that it was better to just stay away from that life unless I really wanted it.

That alone broke my heart just a little more than I needed it to. I love my mum and my family, but sometimes I feel so alone. I can't tell my parents about my sexuality so I'll never bring someone home that I love. I'll never be able to tell them about a hard break up without replacing male pronouns with female ones. I'll never get to talk about someone that was amazing to me or did something cute. I've never even told my mum about my first kiss or my dad if I've even lost my virginity. Believe me, he asked me when I was seventeen about it and I had lost it when I was fifteen to a near twenty year old man. I told him no and that caused the jokes to be fired at me. With my sisters, I don't want to take away any of their beliefs of how the world should be or force them to accept me just because I'm their brother so I stay quiet. Doniya let's me talk to her, but I don't go into detail because I feel like I'm crossing a barrier. So I'm left alone to deal with things and pretend like I'm okay when really I'm hurting.

My dad walked into the living room with a plastic bag from some car parts shop. I kissed my mum's check and followed my dad into the garage to help him fix whatever was wrong with Doniya's car. He quietly gave me a few tools to hold for him then popped up the front hood of the car.

"How have classes been treating you?" My dad asked. I rolled my eyes when he wasn't looking and huffed. I hated uni. I'm happier not going, but I know I have no talent and I'm not going to get money by just being me so I gave to go to school. I'm nearly finished anyway and I'll be able to go into teaching music or working at a producing firm or something. All I know is my degree will be in music and I'm hoping to make enough money so I can live alone for the rest of my life comfortably. And with that sad thought, I knew I was going to start getting mad that Niall couldn't be the one to change my fate for me so I just started paying attention to my dad.