paradise//phan au

8

Dan didn't reply to Brendon's messages that night. A dark, sore feeling was creeping up Dan's throat, almost like a creature trying to claw it's way out. He was sat alone on his bed, all of his lights turned off. Even though he was afraid of the dark, he couldn't bring himself to turn them back on.

Dan didn't want to see anyone. He felt awful. He'd been alone for ages. Neither of his parents came home. He didn't eat. Dan felt awful. When he heard three knocks on the front door he was tempted not to answer, but curiosity and common sense got the better of him. He strolled down the stairs and to the door, opening it lazily. It was Phil. Dan didn't say anything, he just looked on miserably.

"Hey Dan, I know you don't really want me to be here," Dan scoffed, "but I found your book and it was all ruined so, uh, here you go." Phil passed Dan a prestine, brand new copy of Pride and Prejudice. Dan was shocked, I mean, why would a bully randomly turn up at your house and give you a new copy of your book?

Dan was speechless at first, but he decided it was only kind to express his gratitude. "Thank you..." he said, and Phil smiled in response. "No problem! Uhm, okay ill get going now... see you tomo-"

"No, uh, do you want to come in?" Dan didn't really want him to, considering... well, everything, but it's was the decent thing to do.

"Sure." Phil smiled. Dammit.

"O-okay. Uh, do you want something to drink?"

"No, I'm good thanks."

"Okay......"

They fell into an awkward silence, Dan was standing by the kitchen counter and Phil was across from him, leaning on the couch. "So... you like Jane Austen?"

"Yes."

"Cool." Phil coughed. "Uhm, Dan I just wanted to say that, you know, I'm sor-"

Dan cut him off, "Don't you dare start with that bullshit, you arse." He growled. Phil stiffened. "But it's true, I ca-"

"You should leave. Now."

Phil sighed. "We should really talk, Dan."

"No. You know what? You can stay, but I'm leaving." Dan picked up his jacket and keys and strode to the door. "Where are you going?"

"To my boyfriend's, " Dan spat, "see you tomorrow, Philly"

And he left.

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Last night Dan and Brendon spent their time playing video games and cuddling. Dan knew Brendon didn't know what he was getting himself into when he asked Dan out. It was almost as if Dan's pastel clothes and flower crowns hid his.... true emotions, almost. And Dan knew it wouldn't last long. He would just savour the affection while it lasted....

Dan skipped school. He was walking through the streets, a Shake Away milkshake in hand. Maybe I should break it off with Brendon... no, Dan. Stop thinking like that.

It won't work anyway. He's too good for me. I'm a fool for trying.
Stop it Dan.

I don't deserve him. And he deserves better.
Dan..

His thoughts were muddled and gloomy, he couldn't think straight *AyyyeEeEEeeEee* . He heard his phone ringing. Brendon.

"Hello?"

"Dan, I was so worried, I came to fetch you from school but you weren't there and I just didn-"

"I'm fine."

"Where are you?"

"I don't know."

"What are you doing?"

"I don't know"

"Dan.... should I come pick you up?"

"No."

"Dan tell me where you are."

"I don't know."

"Fuck Dan just ask someo-"

"I love you."

He hung up. It's not as if Dan didn't want to tell Brendon where he was, it was just that he genuinely didn't know. He's never been to this area before, and he liked it. The uncertainty - although it was terrifying - he enjoyed it. His phone buzzed multiple times, obviously Brendon trying to contact him. Dan walked past a creaky,old looking house. And he saw someone watching him from a window. That someone just happened to be Phil. Great. Dan put his head down and started walking faster than before. He heard a door slam shut behind him, he didn't dare turn around. "Dan, what are you doing here?" Phil shouted from behind him. "Leave me the fuck alone, Lester."

"Jesus Christ, Dan, you really need to calm your tits."

Dan was fuming. He didn't respond.
He suddenly stopped. The weight of everything was weighing down on him in that moment. He felt as though he couldn't breath. Phil's lips were moving, but Dan couldn't hear a word. Just a dull thumping. He felt as though he was going to faint. Adrian was gone. Martyn, Brendon, Phil, Mum, Dad. Dan was crying. He ran away from Phil to a small green place near a river. He couldn't stop the tears. All of a sudden, warmth enveloped him. Phil was hugging Dan. And Dan hugged back.

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Sorry it's so short I just don't know where I'm going so I need to brainstorm okay bye but flUFF