BTS Oneshots

cucumber smut /// namjoon

"What's the difference between a mango and a papaya?"
Namjoon asked as we walked down the wine aisle. (y/n) stopped and stared incredulously at her boyfriend.

"What the- I don't know! Isn't a mango like a peach?"

Namjoon snickered, "A peach is like red and yellow."

"Then I don't know, look it up." She waited for him to Google. He moved the screen so they could both see. Two pictures of the fruits popped up.
"Oh." They mumbled at the same time.

(Y/n) scratched her head, "it looks like a big lemon. What about a guava?"

They both gasped at the picture that showed.
"It looks like an apple!"

Namjoon laughed, "Yeah, combined with a pear and a lime."
They gawked at the surprising fruits and (y/n) subConsciously walked to the fruits.

She grabbed an orange, "why is there a fruit and a color called the same thing? In Spanish, the color is naranja and the fruit is naranja. Or is the color anaranja, whatever."

Namjoon nodded, "I think it's the same in all languages. I mean, have you ever seen another orange fruit, and don't say carrot because that's not a fruit. It's a root."

She looked around the grocery store. "What about a tomato?"

The taller choked, "A tomato is red! Little kids color it red in drawings!"

She shrugged, "I probably colored it orange."
He nudged her shoulder, "You were also a strange child."

"Oh, what color is a watermelon?"

"Green."

"Then why are watermelon flavored candies pink?"

"Fuck if I know, we aren't talking about candies, we're talking about fruit colors."
(Y/n) pouts. Namjoon pecks her lips, "don't make that face, I will pounce you." She giggled and wiggled her butt at him.

Namjoon grunted. He looked around and picked up a random item.
"If you don't stop teasing me, I swear, I will hit you with this!"

She gawked at him, "you'll hit me with your cucumber?" She tried not to laugh.
Her giggles came to a halt as she noticed her boyfriend's serious expression.

"Would you like me to hit you with my cucumber?"
She blushed, confused.
"Excuse me?"

But, Namjoon only placed down the cucumber. He grabbed their keys, "I'll be waiting in the car," he looked her dead in the eyes, "hurry."

She never checked out so fast.

xoxo

The car ride home was tense. (Y/n) didn't know where to look and her hands were fidgeting everywhere. She sighed in relief as they pulled up to their apartment. The (h/c)-haired girl ran to grab all the groceries. Not even looking at Namjoon, she ran inside, set everything down in the kitchen, and waited in the bedroom. She wasn't exactly aware of what to expect.

(Y/n) jumped when she felt arms wrap around her waist.
"Namjoon-" her words were interrupted by lips pressing against her own. Melting into the kiss, her arms instinctively hung around Namjoon's neck. She moaned when she felt something slip in between her lips. The blonde slowly pushed them down onto the bed. (Y/n) could feel her pulse quicken. They had done this plenty times, but never farther. She wasn't sure if she was ready for a more heated session.

Still, she let Namjoon have his way. His long arms snuck their way up her shirt, rubbing circles on her hips. She let out a long groan as he sucked her neck. She softly pulled his hair, grinning when she hears him moan.

Her eyes pop open when she feels something touching her thighs. (Y/n) nervously looks at her boyfriend.
"I-I, um," she closes her mouth and looks away. "Whatever you want Namjoon."

....

She peaks her eyelids open when laughter fills her ears.
She sees Namjoon covering his mouth.
"It was the cucumber!"
Her eyes widen, the cucumber is in between them on the bed. She kicks it away like it's some disease.
She blushes, embarrassed. Standing up, she quietly walks away. Namjoon grabs her wrist,
"Babe, you aren't mad, are you?"

She says nothing.
"Baby?"

She leans into his chest, hiding her blushed cheeks.
"I just wished you continued."
____

The beginning was based on an actual conversation I had with SarahChildre7
#friendshipgoals