Infinite Reflections

X. The Shipment

For the rest of the night, I tried my best to stay out of the way of the other patients. Curled in the last stall of one of the bathrooms, I hurried into a standing position on one of the toilet seats whenever a nurse entered, acting as invisible as I felt. I didn’t want to be found, content in the cold, smelly getaway I’d poured myself into.

If I wasn’t the only one who had been falsely admitted, how many others had entered under the same conditions? How many others had been framed? A rope slipped around their neck, a knife violently sliced across their wrist, a drug slipped into their unsuspecting drink.

I finally dragged myself out of the bathroom, a sluggish slouch to my walk. I watched helplessly as I passed suicidal after suicidal, deeming in my head whether they had been admitted of their own free will, and on the other hand, if they’d even had a reason to be here. I was just now learning how cruel society was, to shun those that were different, those with problems that they couldn’t control. If any of the others were like Minna, I wanted to help every single one of them.

When I finally made it back to room number 341, I sauntered inside unsuspectingly. What I found was unsettling - a confrontation of my own, as if I was addicted to some sort of hazardous material. I almost tripped as I passed through the doorway, Landon taking a step away from the bed to my side, holding my arm as he escorted me to my bed. I was starting to feel faint, my heart sprinting as I was reminded of the last time I’d felt this pain in my gut.

“I thought you were going to one of the nurses?” Minna asked, her fingers tugging at the edge of my bloodied bandage. She gently unravelled the gauze to find an ugly, red, oozing cut. Minna was quick to bind it with another bandage, her clean hands finding my forehead soon after. “Landon, she’s burning up.”

Landon was still at my side, the back of his hand resting gently against my cheek to confirm Minna. “How are you feeling?” Landon asked, only to see if I’d give any response at all.

“Horrible,” I groaned, fighting against my heavy eyelids. I wanted to stay awake, I wanted to see Landon.

I wanted the comfort.

“I’d better get a nurse,” Teagan announced, standing up from the bed and leaving the room. My vision was blurring until my eyes finally shut, my mind a hazy mess. I could pick out mere snippets of conversations, but nothing more.

“Do you think she’s lost too much blood?” It was Landon’s voice, or maybe Teagan’s, but hadn’t he just left? I was too hazy to hear the response. My consciousness faded soon after.

Landon’s POV

Worry was all that I felt as Syrenne lost consciousness. Had she tried to kill herself? Would she finally succeed? In my mind, I hurried Teagan, staring at Syrenne the entire time. Her lips were thick and pressed together as if she was in pain, although I knew that she couldn’t feel anything at the moment. She was completely unconscious. Her hair lay in thick blonde strands around her head, giving her a look of innocence.

She was a sleeping beauty as far as I was concerned, ripped room her fairy tale world by whatever had upset her, whatever had caused her to make that step towards suicide that had winded her up in Berkeley. It upset me that I still hadn’t found out, but I had to give it more time.

“It’s all my fault,” Minna gushed, her hands gripping the hair surrounding her forehead. She slipped from the edge of the bed to the floor, hugging her knees but pulling her hair at the same time. “This is all my fault,” she repeated, a shocked yet emotionless look masking her features. She was pulling her hair so hard, I could see the whites of her knuckles.

I let Syrenne go, knowing that I could do nothing to comfort her now that she had fallen into unconsciousness. Teagan was getting help, and I had to help Minna before she slipped further into the depression I’d been struggling to pull her out of.

Kneeling at Minna’s side, I removed her hands from her hair, wrapping my arms around her frail body as she did the same to mine. “It isn’t your fault, Minna,” I began, unsure of what I would say to calm her down. “We still don’t know why she passed out, she could have done this to herself,” I suggested as I began to feel her sobs against my chest.

“If I hadn’t been so stupid she wouldn’t have cut herself,” she sobbed, fisting her hands into the cloth of my shirt, clenching her fists tightly shut.

“It isn’t your fault, Minna, you didn’t tell her to do it,” I insisted, removing one of my arms so that I could run my fingers gently through her red hair.

“She did it for me, Lanny,” Minna choked quietly, burying her face harder into my chest.

It was then that Teagan returned with two male nurses and a stretcher. They were quick to load Syrenne and ship her away, all of the suicidals gathering in the hallway to watch the new girl get shipped off for the first time. They all knew the drill, for most of them had been through it, one way or another, especially Minna.

We gathered in the hallway to watch Syrenne go, though I soon realized it was a mistake.

“Gee, Minna, you sure fucked that one up fast,” one of the boys snickered down the hall, causing Minna to bury further into my side.

I couldn’t take my eyes off of the figure that stood at the end of the hall, watching with the first emotion that I had ever seen him give, sympathy.

What did Levi have to do with this?