Bad Intentions

eighteen.

Normani's POV

It's been three months since I last talked to Lauren. Lauren was someone who I deeply cared for and I was so in love with her, and my mind was just wrapped around her. I forgot who I was. The album ended up getting remade since I was in the process of writing the last few songs, but it didn't feel right. I didn't want to release anything that didn't explain how I'm feeling currently. All the songs were written when I was in love with Lauren. All the songs revolved around her. I was just about to release it, but then we broke up.

So now, I've redone my album, kept some songs from the previous record, but this one explains me more. There's more emotion and it's not just focused on love. It's focused on trust, heartbreak, love, and finding who I really am. It is a lot different from the last one. It was more of a fun, hip hop, pop, album, and now this one is more sensitive and lyrical. I'm not just talking about how much I'm in love with someone. I'm actually explaining myself.

The only songs I kept on this album were The Way and All Things Go. These two meant a lot to me. Especially The Way. I don't want to disregard my feelings I had with Lauren, they are apart of my story, and they should be told. The Way focused on how much I loved her and the way she did things. She made me feel good and happy, and I hadn't felt that in a while.  All Things Go was my favorite. It is literally self explanatory. All Things Go. From the most important things to people. It just basically explained how I'm human too and I face issues that almost everyone goes through.

Currently, I released two songs, one called Just Different and the other called a Million. Both songs are about what I went through in my previous relationship, but both give a different vibe. Just Different is about my heart will always love Lauren, but it'll never be the same. Million is just talking about how her love went deep and how it was such a good feeling with her.

Tonight I had performed both songs on Jimmy Fallon. It was an outdoor concert I had done for the fans, since it's the most I can do for them since I pushed the album back. Both songs got such positive feedback since I released them so the most I could  do is perform them live for the first time. I was going to wait for tour, but I wanted to surprise them.

Just Different was one of my favorites. I wrote it right after the break up and I recorded it in my basement back at home in Houston. It was a more pure affect to the songs on this album since everything was recorded in my homemade studio I made when I was a kid. At home, I'm more able to actually write everything out, since I'm in my comfort zone and I don't have people around me telling me I need to hurry up with the lyrics. 

No one is prepared for this album. This is one is more me. No co-writers, ghostwriters, just me and my notepad. Everything on this album was done by me. I mainly produced the whole thing, but I got help from a former friend of mine.

Tonight, I'm dropping the album. No one knows it's coming. It's a complete surprise. The only thing people know is that I recorded two songs and I'm still in the recording process. I told them the album should be out late May only because I want them to think it's going to be forever.

"Babe," My boyfriends arms wrapped around my waist as I quickly exited out of what I was looking at on my laptop. "I know you were reading about Lauren and that girl." He said, snuggling his face in the crook of my neck. "But you gotta let that shit go." He said, kissing my neck softly.

I moved my head, and turned and looked at him. "Diggy, it's all over the internet. I can't run from it. It's not like I'm looking at it on purpose." I told him.

"Good, because I'm actually loyal to you." He said, winking at me. "Your album dropped a couple minutes ago. Twitter is going crazy, and you don't even seem happy about it."