"Her name is Anna" GirlxGirl

Ramona

no sleep. absolutely no sleep last night. I took two adderall so now, I am standing in Natalie's house that I just detail cleaned.

I'm pretty sure this is the cleanest this house has ever seen. I tossed the last beer bottle in the trash when Amelia appeared from around the corner.

"hey baby," I smiled at her, as I dragged the trash bag behind me.

"hey, Ray. aren't we suppose to do lunch with your family today ?" she tilted her head.

I sighed. "yeah, Amelia. we will leave here in about 20 minutes ? then we will go to my house I guess."

I left her standing at the entry way of the kitchen and I dragged the trash bag out of the house and into the neighbors trash can.

when i got back inside Amelia wasn't where I left her. so I ran up the stairs and into Nat's bathroom. as soon as I opened the door I stopped dead in my tacks when I saw Anna standing at the shower, back facing me, completely naked. she didn't notice me so I swallowed hard and grabbed my makeup bag, getting out of there as soon as possible. it would have been completely fine except for the fact that Anna was so attractive. I couldn't help but get a little turned on. what especially didn't help was imagining her in the shower, her naked, wet body....

fuck.

shocked at what I had just seen I walked into Natalie's room. on the bed was a passed out Nat and a passed out boy with black hair. I smiled at it for a second. Nat definitely knew how to get a guy, and she enjoyed the hell out of them too.

I shook Natalie lightly and stopped once her eyes fluttered open. "what?" she moved her hands.

"me and Amelia are leaving, im coming out to my parents! wish me luck," I grabbed my purse from underneath her bed and walked right out of the room.

-

"Ah! none of that! we have guests here that don't know Spanish!" my mamà snapped at my Abuela.

Abuela pursed her lips. "¿Si no son hispanos por qué están aquí?" she muttered under her breath. (which translates to "if they are not Hispanic why are they here?")

"I don't know, maybe because we live in america?" Mamà snapped yet again.

I sighed and rolled my eyes. I don't understand why Abuela even came here to the U.S if she hated it so much.

Amelia sat next to me, underneath the table she grabbed my hand as Mamà set the good on front of us. the last thing on my mind was good right now but I still very politely added some of my mom's re-fried homemade beans.

the whole table was my four cousins, two uncles and my aunt, along with their spouses. also Mamà's best friend Paula. to say the least, it was a full table.

"Ramona! tell us about school. and you're whole hand moving thing ?" Mamà said and sloshed beans onto her own plate.

"uhm. yeah. I'll be graduating at the end of the year. and I'm hoping to go the University of Washington to be a vetanarian and maybe be an interpreter too," I nodded, smushing beans sitting on my plate

"an interpreter for what, Mí primo," my cousin's thick accent spoke up.

"american sign language," I spoke loudly, that's the only way you'll be heard at the Hispanic gathering.

"¡firmar algo!" Anna, my other cousin yelled.

"I don't know what you want me to sign but I will say things like grapes, potato, english, doughnut" I listed in sign language

"I don't get it," she said.

"oh that's enough. no sense in trying to teach a language to people who can barely speak English," my mother shook her head.

well. now or never. I squeezed Amelia's hand tightly and stood up.

"I have something to say." i swollowed hard and took a deep breath. "Lo siento mucho acerca de esto, pero yo soy una lesbiana, Amelia es mi novia desde hace un tiempo que tendría que haber dicho todo mucho antes," I could feel my heart drop into my stomach as the words left my mouth. my mom looked at me stunned. the only person who didn't look surprised at all was my cousin, the oldest, Àndres, I told him a couple years ago. he just looked at me with a supporting smile.

"¿cómo pudiste hacer esto a su familia! usted es una decepción. chica repugnante. No quiero volver a poner los ojos en usted otra vez," Abuela narrowed her eyes at me in betrayal.
(How could you do this to your family! you are a disappointment. nasty girl. I never want to lay eyes on you again)

"please, Abuela. I didn't choose this. I could have chosen this," I pleaded

"I cant believe youre being so selfish," Luciana, my older sister spat at me.

"I'm not! its who I am," tears started coming down and I couldn't seem to control it anymore.

"I went you out of my house. I will not have this kind of behavior in my house," papà wouldn't even meet my eyes.

for some reason I stopped I looked around. mamá wouldn't look at me. all doubt on whether or not this was the right thing washed away.

"come on, Amelia. I wouldn't want to bother them with my existence much longer," I pulled her upfrom her chair. her fork fell to the floor with a clatter.

"you have an hour to get all your stuff, you never come back," papà growled.

I grabbed plastic bags and went upstairs with Amelia. I looked around my room, I threw the trash bag roll against the wall. I was so angry. how could they treat their own daughter like that ?

"I'm so sorry, Ray. I shouldn't have made you do it," Amelia looked down at her feet.

"no this is not your fault at all, A. I needed to do it. I couldn't lie to them about who I am. help me shove clothes in bags okay ?" I handed her a bag and she nodded.

we got all my stuff packed up within a half an hour.

I walked straight out of the front door with Amelia behind me. I didn't look at my family again.

"you can stay with me, Ramona. you know that right?" Amelia looked at me from the passenger seat.

"I think it would be best if I stayed at Natalie's right now. I love you though. thanks for being here with me," I pulled out of the drive way, knowing I wasn't returning to it.

we drove in almost complete silence, besides the low tune of the radio.

when we got to Amelia's, I turned to her and kissed her quickly, waiting for her to get out.

"love you," she said quietly and almost slammed the car door behind her.

I get disowned by my own parents and she's the one who's mad at me.