«C h a p t e r F o u r»

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     It's been two weeks. Just fourteen days since I met Scotty..my secret nickname for him. We haven't spoken, texted, anything like that. I can't help but wonder if he ever had an interest in me. I go about my day as normal but I'll swear up and down that I seen his face in a store or his motorcycle in a parking lot. I will meet his soul-tearing stare, like he truly is with me one minute but he's gone the next. What is with me, is all I can think of as my right hand turns cold. I've never been the one to stir over a guy, really, any guy, no matter how good looking. I blame the concussion I had. I think Anita gave me more than anti-inflammatories, because I haven't been the same since I took them...since that night. I just want things back to how they were.
    Androids signature ping ignites my phone. Mollie.
Hurry up! Let's get moving, sunshine  :)

Okay, okay...coming -J
     I grab my side strap purse that I only use when I travel somewhere crowded. My worn-down backpack I wouldn't trust for the festival. My pastel yellow sundress needs ironed by the looks of it in the mirror and my hair is frizzy. Who am I trying to impress? I need to impress no one, I remind myself. Another ping. I'll check it later.
     Mollie let's me drive now when we are both headed to the same destination. If she wasn't feeling overly pregnant she would drive herself.
     "Thanks for the ride, death trap," Mollie says as she maneuvers her way outside the car.
    "Funny," I reply with a death glare to match my nickname.
     The sun is unbelievably bright and warm today since there isn't a cloud in sight. There are too many people here. My anxiety is climbing a mountain with every step closer towards the crowd. I begin to clean my nails with my teeth to help my fear. It's best to look ahead to find the nearest break of space but the sun won't allow that today. I'm facing this festival head on.
     Mollie grabs my arm to pull me forward-unaware that I had stopped walking.
     "Who are you looking for?" Mollie persists something is up since the whole Scott situation. No way I'm telling her. She wouldn't shut up about it. Heck, she still isn't and she doesn't even know what... okay, whom...the subject is on.
     "Is Jamie coming home today?" Jamie has been gone for almost a week. I haven't seen her since the bonfire though. I've drowned myself on working since then; she even had to drop off my phone.
     "Jolene!" Mollie shouts, frustrated at my change of behavior.
     "Yeah Molls."
     Her brown eyes roll at me."Let's look at this jewelry tent. Come on!" Once again my arm is grabbed and I'm pulled through the crowd. I hate being touched but I'm so used to it by Mollie and Jamie. They phase me the least.
     My eyes wonder around to the Pandora charms. Every time Mollie and I see one together, we buy each other a charm. We believe buying ourselves charms are bad luck. I have four charms, Mollie has six; Austin sent her two in the mail. I spot a little flame charm and pick it up.
     "Fire, am I?" Mollie questions.
     "You have a short fuse and you have a fiery passion to make the world a better place and my life miserable." I smile chastly.
      Mollie picks up the snowflake next to the flame, "then you are a snowflake because though beautiful and unique you heart is as cold as ice." Her smile matches mine. I'm glad Mollie gets me.
     We check out and Mollie already has the day planned. "We need to grab pretzel bites, some drinks, look at all tents but not after we watch a few bands play.
     I nod in agreement to please her. I don't mind the pretzels and drinks but the tents and bands I'll pass on. Last thing I need is to be trampled by the tristate area over deals and listen to girls swoon over boys because they can sing or have a guitar. Jamie and I always let Mollie and Austin have their fun while we sit back and play Jamie's favorite game of people watching. I'm just thankful to be out of crowds way.
     "Hey, I'm going to look at the list of bands playing. There are a couple groups that come back every year and I want to see what time they play."
     I nod again, staring off into the distance. "I'll get our pretzels," I'm not even sure if she has left already or what. I'm going anyways.
     The line is longer than I'd like...I'll look at my phone while I wait...my text waits for me.
Is this Jolene?
     An unknown number...could it be him?
Depends on who's asking.. -J
     I turn off my phone. My heart rate is increasing. I'm not sure if I want to know who it is.
     The line is moving rather quickly, I'm close to the front of the line.
     A familiar touch taps my shoulder, Jamie?
     I turn around with a wide grin, "James-" my smile is quickly exchanged with a frown, "Anita?"
     "Yes, yes, I am happy to see you too." A small smile plays on her lips. I am liking her much more without her medical equipment. "How is your ankle and head?"
     "They're better. Thank you for the medicine by the way. I wasn't expecting any."
    
     Scott slammed on the breaks when we got to my house.
     I spring up from his lap is disbelief of my action towards him.
     "Here," is all he says. I take the pills. There are no other words exchanged. I don't want to look at him but I do.
     Those dang golden eyes like the sun were already watching me like a hawk. His eyes make me want to run. Inside. Away from him. I break contact and open the door. He grabs my arm.
     "Take care of yourself, please." Scott pauses as if he wishes to say more but he doesn't. I want to know what he's thinking about.
     It's my turn. Crap. "I'll do my best." Should I say more? What am I supposed to say? "Goodbye Scott Gettrell. It was nice meeting you."
     I shut the door. Goodbye. Nice meeting you..really!? Out of all the things I could have told him I was kind and used words I've refused to use in years. What the fuck is wrong with me?
    
     Anita gives me a strange look. I need it to stop. "What?"
     "It's your turn Jolene"
     "Oh..sorry"
     I order Mollie and I's pretzel bites and two blueberry-pomegranate smoothies. Mollie better love me.
     "Date?" Anita prods in. I forgot she was behind me.
     "Yep." I say sarcastically. Anita has her mouth open and I think no words will ever come out until she says, "okay." She bites her tongue and snaps her head away from me as if I stepped on her foot with a stiletto and didn't apologize. Is she mad at me?  I can't care. I need to grab a seat with Mollie.
     Maneuvering through a crowd is hard enough without food and drink in hand.
     "Look what I got you!" I holler holding her smoothie up to the clouds. I search the crowd until I see it-a tiny hand in the distance. You can't keep a pregnant woman away from food is what I've learned. I laugh for the first time in what seems like ages and join her in the second row.
     "Why are we all the way up here? It'll be way too loud."
     "That's the point. This baby needs to hear good music.  A couple bands I like play back to back, they come every year."
     "Please tell me you don't plan on bringing you and that belly up to the front like a little fan girl like the rest of them?"
     Mollie smiles wide, "of course. There is this boy I've crushed on since I was a preteen he'd sing with his parents."
     I roll my eyes at her, "Mollie you're nuts-"
     She cuts me off, "and there's two guys I have even bigger crushes on. Twin brothers!"
     "You have crushes? And you're married?" I open my mouth in disbelief.
     "Hey, it's eye candy. And I follow them on Facebook." Mollie barks a laugh, "like they want all of this," she cuffs her belly around her arms.
     I look to my right and find a guy watching us in the distance. He looks around her age, maybe younger. "He does," I eye him. He spits on the ground. Yuck.
    "Over here!" Mollie waves him over. "This is what you get."
     "WHAT!" I nearly shout. "What did I do?" The man is coming closer.
     Mollie sits me down and then seats herself to my left. "There is something going on with you and this is what you get for not telling me. He might end up being your soul mate."
     "He is spilling booze just walking over here." My face is blooming shades of red. "You sure can pick em'."
     "Just have fun and enjoy the music." Mollie doesn't know what happened the last time I had 'fun'.
     "I hate you."
     "No you don't."
     "Well howdy ladies!" The drunk man is swaying in the sun. His breath reeks of beer.
     "I'm Mollie, and this is my sister, Jolene." Mollie stretches her arms protectively around her stomach. His Christmas colored eyes squint in realization.
     "Jolie. I'm Alan." He smiles at me which would be nicer if he didn't have chew in his mouth. Why did Mollie do this to me? Or better yet, how come he isn't interested in the pregnant woman?
     "Hi." I want him gone. I don't care about his blonde hair or high eyes and chew teeth.
     "Sit. Please. Enjoy the show with us!" Mollie is getting too involved.
     I look at her with complete hatred, or try to. Alan would be okay if he took those things away. Right now he's obnoxious.
     We all sit as the speakers come on, Alan puts his arm around me. I freeze my position so I don't shove him and go off.
     "These bands are really for the chicks and elderly couples now a days but the beer is good."
     I can't help but chuckle the slightest. "I'm not into these bands. My sister is." Mollie isn't paying attention anymore, she's searching the band performance times again.
     A Celtic type band is the first to come. They are okay, for Celtic.
     "See, all but like a few bands return every year. Once in a while they'll get a real good one, but that's rare." Alan talks with his hands. Every brush on my shoulder sends me chills.
     "You cold? In this heat?" He grabs my arm and rubs it. I only nod with a closed smile. The conversation is okay but there is no bubble.
     "I'm fine now, thanks." I rush my words and space myself from him. "So, what do you do for a living?"
     "Just got out of college looking for work. You?"
     "Flower shop."
     Alan gulps his beer until he's dry. "Be right back, getting another."
     I watch him as he slowly approaches his friends and they all seem as drunk and high as him. He can stay there. Thankfully, the Celtic music drowns out their voices so I can't lose any brain cells while listening to them. It's almost easy to get lost in their songs. Nothing seems as easy anymore. I eye my new moon shaped scar. It makes me want to not listen to music. I sip my smoothie and look at my phone.
 Austin..? Is this JoJo?

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