Metronome (FOB FanFic ft. Tyler Joseph)

Chapter 20

I approached the closed classroom door and peered inside, my short, quick breaths fogging up the small window ever so slightly. I saw Patrick sitting at the piano, playing a tune I wasn't familiar with. His eyes were closed and he was moving his body with the music, leaning back and forth and swaying side to side as his hands glided across the keys effortlessly.

"I, tonight? I feel like being alone.
If you don't mind, if you don't mind
Would you please be so kind
To close the door behind you..."

I bit my lip and placed my hands on the door, the one thing separating me from him. I watched as he continued his song, completely unaware of my presence outside of his classroom.

"It's been a long, long time
Since I've had this line of doubt out loud.
So I, tonight? I feel like...
I feel like...I feel, baby now..."

Just then, my phone began to ring. I took in a sharp breath as I froze, hoping Patrick wouldn't hear it and look up and notice me. Much to my relief, however, he didn't, and the piano continued to create its melodious sounds, accompanied by Patrick's captivating vocal range.

"Everybody wants somebody
Who doesn't want them,
Who wants somebody else, baby.
You want somebody?..."

I turned away from the door and shoved my hand into my bag that hung by my hip, fishing around for my phone that was still going off. My fingers wrapped around the device and I whipped it out, seeing that Josh was calling me.

"Oh, you want someone?
Somebody else, somebody else
Listen now
Don't get hurt, don't you get hurt.
Don't get hurt, don't you get..."

I answered it on the last ring and put the phone up to my ear, "Josh?"

"A young man is a pulled pin looking for a grenade
A young woman will drive you places you never meant to go
But epiphany is such a cliche..."

"Evie." He sounded as though he had been crying.

"There's plenty of fish in the wrong sea
Like there's a premium on mystery again..."

"Josh, what's wrong?" I demanded to know, my heart beat that had just started to return to normal picking back up.

"Hold me, distract me, dress me up in bubbles baby
Save me from the troubles of my own skin..."

"It's Tyler..."

"Everybody wants somebody
Who doesn't want them,
Who wants somebody else, baby.
You want somebody?..."

"What...What about him?"

"Oh, you want someone?
Somebody else, somebody else
Listen now
Don't get hurt, don't you get hurt.
Don't get hurt, don't you get..."

"He's...He's dead."

*****

I sat in the waiting room of the hospital with my elbows resting on my knees, supporting my head as I held it in my hands. Dried tears streaked my cheeks and my eyes stung. Sitting beside me was Josh. He was slouched in the chair he was in, his hands folded in his lap and his eyes locked forward as he stared at the wall across from us. The two of us hadn't spoken a single word to each other the whole time I was there. We just hugged for a while when I showed up then sat down, and we'd been sitting in those same two seats since.

Tyler's family was down the hallway, in his room, mourning over his death. Apparently Josh had called them before me, and they arrived shortly before I did.

I could hear his mom screaming, asking why, why did this have to happen? I wanted to cry, but my eyes were dry. I simply had no more tears to shed.

"I should've taken him back," I murmured, my voice barely above a whisper.

Josh remained silent for a while before replying with, "No."

I glanced back at him, "What do you mean 'no'?"

"He wasn't good for you, Evie," He muttered, shifting awkwardly in his chair, "He was cheating on you, and you not taking him back was probably for the best. Because if you did take him back, I don't think he would've changed."

"But it's my fault he's dead," I argued, not wanting to believe what he was telling me. "If I'd taken him back-"

"He didn't do what he did because you didn't take him back, Ev," Josh interrupted me, starting to get upset, "Trust me."

"Why?" A blanket of silence fell over the two of us as I anticipated his answer. "Josh?"

"Because I was with him that night, okay?" He snapped, standing up and walking away from me.

I rose to my feet and followed him, "Wait, you were with him that night? And you didn't stop him?"

Josh froze in his tracks and spun around so he was facing me, "I wasn't there when he did it, Ev. I was there before. He called me over that night and when I was there, he seemed upset, but it's not like he hasn't been upset before."

"What was he upset about?"

Josh's cheeks grew a deep shade of red and he rubbed the back of his neck, "When he called me over, he said he wanted to talk. And I did too. I...I wanted to tell him that I didn't think...that I didn't think it was working out anymore."

"It?"

"The band, Evie! The band!" He was on edge, tears wavering in his eyes. I swallowed the lump that was in my throat. "I wanted to tell him that I didn't think the band was working out anymore. I'd been wanting to tell him it for a while, but I just couldn't find the right time. So when he called me over, I...I took the opportunity. I walked in, he opened his mouth to say something, and I told him what I wanted to say. Of course he was hurt when I said that I didn't want to be in the band anymore, It hurt me to tell him. But I...when I left...I didn't think he would do something like this. He's not that kind of person."

"So it's your fault he tried to kill himself," I crossed my arms.

"No," He quickly defended himself, "It's not my fault. And it's not yours either."

He was right. It wasn't Josh's fault, and it wasn't my fault either. I knew that. I just wanted a reason, a reason why Tyler would do something like this. And to put the blame on someone was easier than trying to figure out who was really at fault, if there even was someone at fault.

I'd only been dating Tyler for a little more than a year, but I knew there was something more to the gifted songwriter and amazing musician than he led on. He only opened up so much. There was so much more that he didn't tell me, that he didn't tell anyone, that he kept to himself.

"I'm just not ready to live in a world without him," Josh whimpered, tilting his head down and blinking away the tears that were forming in his eyes.

I extended my arms out and pulled him into another hug, mumbling into the shoulder of his shirt as a newfound set of tears flooded my eyes, "Me either."